Oh, Captain-!
by Chaetura
Summary: [LevixFemReader] As an MP officer, your life was simple and good; all you had to do was stay out of trouble and do your job. One day, an unexpected encounter throws your peaceful life off the track. A time has come for you to ponder what you want from your life, but what mixes things up even more is the mysterious scout regiment captain and a question... what does he want from you?
1. Ch1 Sucker Punch

"You should've seen the poor guy's face..! And when I say poor, I mean literally; We'll see if he has anything to scrap together for the next month's payment!"

Whole table erupted into a loud laughter― Everyone except you, who were too busy staring at the empty beer pint in front of you.

"Hey, [f/n]!" Emmett called for you across the table. He tried to keep up his cheery, carefree act, but you could tell that your lack of approval― or interest whatsoever― towards his humor was displeasing him more than he let it show. Overall, Emmett was quite a nice looking guy; That untamed honey-blond hair combined to a pair of bright blue eyes and chiseled face-features were more than enough to drive the regiment girls crazy, not forgetting his broad-shouldered build. Looks were deceiving, though. "Why so gloomy? C'mon, we're here to have fun after a long day, not to sit in the corner and sulk!" He sneered before chugging down the rest of his pint with a single gulp.

"What? Oh, no, I'm not gloomy―" Flashing on the most convincing smile possible, you leaned back on your chair in a relaxed manner. "I'm just tired, that's all. I guess I've had a couple too many beers~" To be honest, you were bored as hell. Spending the whole night in a dirty pub and getting wasted wasn't exactly your favorite way to spend the little free time you had, especially when the company was what is was… But you'd do what you had to keep up the appearances; In the military police, you had to know who to smile to or your life could quickly get unpleasant― Ever since your rookie days you had made it clear you were no pushover whatsoever, but that alone wouldn't be enough to keep your ass out of trouble. If all the other commanding officers went out for drinks every other weekend, so did you. Emmett opened his mouth to say something, but was interrupted by one of his friends.

"Psst, Emmett..! You'll never guess who's here..!" His friend snickered, nodding at the corner table across the room.

"Scout regiment bastards..!" Emmett muttered under his breath as he scowled at the unexpected visitors. People were low on trust with the military at the moment― It wasn't a surprise that the government threw all the blame on scout regiment, and this far most of the folk were buying it. Of course, this was only an excuse for military police officers like Emmett to use every given chance to throw more shit at them. Military police and scout regiment had never been in too good terms anyways, but now only being under the same roof seemed to be enough to reach the boiling point.

"They have a lot of nerve to show their faces here..! Especially after their latest mission…" One of your fellow officers said quietly, eyes also nailed on the figures across the room. They couldn't continue their quiet grumbles and venomous glares for long when only after a few minutes their targets stood up to leave― The look Emmett's face told you he was up to no good, and sure enough he stood up at the very moment the scout regiment members had made their leave; Everyone except one.

" _Oh crap..!"_ You felt a twist in your stomach when you realized who Emmett was marching towards to: " _That's_ -"

"Captain Levi Ackerman!" Emmett, now back in his forced cheerful act, had already made his way to the bar counter with couple of his friends, standing obviously too close to comfort of the Scout regiment Captain. "What a surprise to see _you_ here." He smirked viciously. Captain Levi, instead, didn't say a word, barely even acknowledging Emmett's presence in any way. Throwing a couple coins on the counter to pay his group's tab, he just turned away to leave― This made the grin quickly fade from Emmett's face, now replaced with an annoyed frown. "Not even a hello? C'mon… You don't want us to think you're some kind of a douché, do you?" He snapped as he grabbed onto Levi's shoulder and spun him back towards him in a rough manner. "I just wanted to have a nice chat, that's all."

"What's your problem?" Levi finally spoke up, still refusing to look at the troublemaker in the eye. The bar was dead silent at this point, all eyes on the duo.

"What's _my problem_?!" Emmett's eyes widened in both anger and surprise. " _My problem_ is that _your_ regiment consists of delusional, suicidal bastards..! If you want to play outside the wall so bad, be my guest… But I'm sick and tired that we're wasting all the taxpayer's money on your one-way field trips!"

"Makes sense." Raven haired man stated quietly. "For you to be so worried about the tax money, that is." He finally lifted his gaze, now staring Emmett dead in the eye with the coldest look you had ever seen. "But I guess there's always enough to fill your pockets, right?"

"You little-!" You could only see Emmett swung his fist towards the Captain, but the next thing you knew was a loud crack and Emmett's ass on the floor; He didn't get up from the ground, knocked out cold by a single hit. His gang just stood around him mouths open and dumbfounded, simply too shocked to go after Captain Levi who just marched out of the pub. As the door closed behind him, the whole pub erupted into a ruckus, everyone still unable to believe what just had happened. You had waited for an opportunity to make your leave, so you didn't need to think twice before taking your chance and slipping out as well before the dust would settle.

Outside you were greeted by a chilly night air and silent streets. Despite the coldness, you took a minute to sort your thoughts before heading back to MP headquarters; A bar fight between Commanding Officer Emmett and Captain Levi? "Has the world gone mad..?" You sighed, wrapping your jacket tighter around yourself as you made your way down the cobblestone path. " _Emmett's always been an asshole, but this is getting out of hand..."_ You couldn't even reach the main street when you already to halted― For your surprise, you found Captain Levi just outside the gate, leaning against the stonewall. He didn't seem to notice you at first, but quickly straightened his posture when your eyes met.

"Goddamnit… Just leave me the fuck alone, alright?" He snapped at you, tottering quite a bit as he took a step back. "But if your friend wants more, there's a lot where that came from― I'm so fed up with your shit-"

"What?" You finally managed to open your mouth, stunned by his words. His attitude towards you wasn't really a surprise, though; You were a military police officer, after all. "I'm not here to fight, if that's what you mean..!" Pausing for a moment, you lowered your gaze and nervously shifted weight from a feet to other. You really felt bad about how Emmett and the others had acted― Looking back at it, you should've stood up and done something about it... Now all you could do was to apologize. You hadn't planned on what you were going to say― being slightly intoxicated didn't help the situation, either― and standing there under his intense gaze made you suddenly feel surprisingly embarrassed about the whole situation. Levi seemed to notice this, letting his guard down a notch. "I'm sorry. I really am." You finally continued, still keeping your gaze down. "They are real idiots, Emmett and the others… especially Emmett; He got it coming, if you ask me." Snickering a bit at your own words, you glanced up at Levi who had been quietly listening you.

"Oh. Well that's good, then." Regiment captain mumbled under his breath, quickly breaking the eye contact as if he was now the embarrassed one. "I guess I should've… I… I-"

You had seen many things in your life, but witnessing the glorious sight of humanity's strongest soldier puking all over the street was something new. You knew he was drunk, but hadn't expected him to be this wasted― Guess he had masked it pretty well earlier, even landing such a precise punch in Emmett's ugly mug!

"Um… Are you alright?" You asked cautiously as you slowly walked up to him, looking out for any more barf attacks. He couldn't even stand still without tottering, so you carefully took a hold onto his arm to make sure he wouldn't fall face first into his own vomit. His body tensed when you touched him, but he didn't protest either. "Let's call it a day, okay? Come on, I'll take you to bed." You highly doubted that he could get to the scout regiment base by himself in that condition― It wouldn't be too much of a detour for you to walk him there on your way to the military police HQ, and you kinda felt like you owned that to him. "... What?" You frowned when Levi gave you a weirded out look, as if you had suggested something very out of place.

"Well… sure." He raised his eyebrow, still measuring you with his gaze. "Yeah, why not…"

"To your bed, I mean!" Your face instantly flushed red when you realized what he must be thinking. "I didn't-"

"I guess that works too." Not listening to your explanations, he nudged himself away from your grasp and began slowly and surely tottering down the street. "Let's get going, then― And no, I don't need help if that's what _*hiccup*_ you're thinking."

"No, I didn't mean that we- Gah, whatever… Suit yourself." You rolled your eyes, being very less than convinced by his performance. "And by the way… the scout regiment base is **in this direction**!"


	2. Ch2 Gossip Material

"What… happened… to the part… that you could… walk… by yourself..?!" You huffed and puffed as you dragged Levi through the hallways of the scout regiment base. "Your legs just suddenly gave up?! Luckily we're almost there… I think." What was supposed to be a mere ten minute walk had taken you almost half an hour― Which was a pretty good achievement, taken into account that you had to basically carry him almost the whole way. "Thank god almost everyone are in bed…" You muttered under your breath, scanning the empty hallways as you waddled forwards with him. "I'd rather have no-one witnessing this anyways… You sure this one is the right hallway?" You had crisscrossed all around the building for a good while trying to find his room― Needless to say that the drunkard captain wasn't much of a help. "Hey? ...Hello?!" You had to shake him a couple of times before he sluggishly raised his head, only to grunt and nod at the door to your left before falling back to his coma-like state. "This is it? Really?" You blinked surprised. "Finally…" Inching the final meters forward, you reached to open the door― But it was locked. "You gotta be kidding me. Alright… The key?"

"...In my pocket…"

"Ugh… Fine." When he show no intention of handing over the key, you took the matters to your own hands; You somehow managed to place him against the wall, but to be able to use both of your hands you had to hook his arm over your shoulder― Normally being this close to someone you barely knew would make you feel rather embarrassed, but at this point you were simply too tired (and drunk) to give a fuck. " _Get him into his room. Go home. Go to bed. SLEEP."_ You repeated in your mind as you began going through his jacket pockets. "Any idea which pocket they're in?"

No answer.

" _You gotta be kidding me…"_ You felt a warmth creep onto your cheeks as you reached down to check his pants' pockets. " _Damn military and their ridiculously tight pants, I swear I'll_ ―" Your heart missed a beat when just then Levi lifted his gaze, staring you straight in the eye. Not daring to move a muscle, you just stood there frozen, face only inches away from his. For your surprise, after a second― which felt like an eternity― he broke the eye contact to look at something behind you.

"Oi. What are you staring at? Trot off, will you?" He snapped at someone behind you. Glancing over your shoulder, you caught a glimpse of a somewhat shocked looking cadet who quickly skittered away as commanded. " _How long he was standing there?! No, wait..! I hope he saw the whole thing, otherwise this could almost look like we're_ ―" Only now realizing your hand was still on Levi's upper thigh, you knew exactly how it must have looked like― You squirmed away from his immediate presence so swiftly you almost knocked the poor captain over, but managed to grab onto his shoulder barely in time.

"Captain; Please hand over the key." Although you made it sound like a polite request, the tension in your voice told more than enough about your current mindset. And of course, that flaming red face of yours. Trying your best to hide it, you kept your gaze down until Levi finally found the key and handed it over to you.

"Finally… I thought this day would never come…" You squealed as you dragged the drunkard captain across the bedroom. Mustering all your remaining strength, you flopped him on the bed― Or that's what you were trying to do, but ended up crashing into the bed with him. "Oh for fuck's sake..! Do you have any idea how much trouble you are?!" You whimpered, all exhausted and very much annoyed as you tried to squirm out of the bed. It proved out to be more difficult as expected; You could barely see a thing in the darkness, not mentioning all the blankets and sheets you kept tangling into. Levi didn't say a word, steady breathing telling you he was already fast asleep. "What a day… How on earth I ended up in this situation..?" Giving up on your struggle, you rolled next to him to catch your breath. "Emmett wants my head on a stake if anyone finds about this… Why I can't just stay out of trouble..? If there's anything good in this situation, at least you won't most probably remember this cringey adventure of ours, right?" You glanced at the sleeping captain next to you. "I'll get out of here and it's like you never even knew I was here. You didn't seem to remember me earlier, anyways…"

* * *

" _My poor head… I swear, I'll never drink again…"_

You didn't even drink that much last night, but the lack of sleep definitely affected the state of your hangover. Your legs felt like mush, which wasn't really a surprise after dragging Captain Levi through the city and all around the scout regiment HQ. He wasn't exactly a big guy, thank god, but neither were you! Overall, you felt like shit at the moment and wished you could just sleep the whole day― But the sunlight behind your eyelids told you were already running late. Whimpering and groaning at the nauseous feeling in your stomach, you finally forced your eyes open.

" _What the-?! Oh no-no-no-_ _ **no-!**_ " Now wide awake like from the hit of a lightning, you sprung up, unable to believe your eyes. " _I'm still here?!"_ It was true; You were still in **his** bedroom. " _I must have fallen asleep-"_ Feeling of a pure shock bolted through your body when you glanced at the raven haired man next to you. The whole situation looked very different with a sober mind― Much more horrifying, that is. "Oh... fuck. Oh fuck!" You were out of the bed in record time, but all the ruckus you made woke up Captain Levi who had still been fast asleep a moment ago. He looked just as shocked as you, but more than anything confused as he stared down at the person on the floor of his bedroom.

"I… Uh…" You stuttered, unable to take your eyes from his as you stumbled up from the floor. You had no idea what to say― Part of you just wanted to bolt out of the room without a word, but you had to say something! Something, anything! "I'm… I… Sorry, thank you and goodbye!" After squealing out those words accompanied by a brief bowing gesture, it didn't take longer than two seconds until you were out of the room, leaving extremely confused Heichou there by himself. In the doorway you almost bumped at the Commander Erwin Smith, who looked very surprised to say at least when you bolted through the door. "Eh?! Uh… Good morning, Commander!" After giving him a hasty salute, you rushed past him and dashed towards the nearest exit.

Only merely 10 minutes later you stood in the line with the other commanding officers at the military police HQ― You had ran the whole way over there, even going through the trouble of climbing into your room through the window so no-one could guess you had spent your night elsewhere. Thankfully you weren't the only one who was late; " _So far so good―"_ You thought as you scanned your comrades with your gaze. Emmett was nowhere to be seen; Called in sick so he could spend the day nurturing his shattered ego, you guessed. " _I just slept in due to my hangover like half of the people… Like I actually did, but that's just half of the truth."_ Finally starting to relax a bit, you straightened your posture when Commander Nile Dawk arrived to go through the assignments of the day.

Rest of the day went really slowly. You spend the morning patrolling at Stohess district, which was exactly the job you needed at the moment; Normally you didn't like patrolling too much, so tedious as it mostly was, but you felt like you'd already had enough excitement for today. You tried your best just to forget all about your nightly adventures, but something you overheard during lunch piqued your interest:

"...Yeah, I know, right?" One of the cadet girls giggled. "But it doesn't stop there~! After he got his ass kicked by Emmett, he was seen making out with some gal― I mean, he's just a man, alright, but just wait until you hear the rest..!"

" _He? Captain Levi?"_ You frowned to yourself. " _It was Emmett who got his ass kicked, nice job on checking the facts- Wait what?! Making out?!"_ What they were talking about?

"They were all over each other right out there in the scout regiment base hallway! He's a captain and everything, he should be a bit more careful where and when he lets his manly-man hormones take over!" All three girls erupted into a loud giggling, but you weren't laughing― Eyes glued onto the half eaten meal in front of you, you sat there holding your breath as you waited them to continue. "You haven't even heard the best thing yet― That girl… was a military police officer!"


	3. Ch3 Mission Impossible

" _It's official. My life is over."_ The gossips were spreading like a wildfire, every person adding something new to the story. There was possibly a silver lining, though; " _They didn't say anything about me, did they?"_ The story was constantly changing and so did the facts which could tie you to it. Feeling a spark of hope in your heart, you focused on eavesdropping the girls again. And sure enough, they soon turned back to the subject you were eagerly waiting to hear more about.

"She was from military police? Really?" Someone gasped. "You sure?"

"Positive. Not even my cousin Derrick, a simpleton he is, wouldn't mistake that big ass insignia on that girl's back."

"But… who was it?"

An unnerving silence.

"Hmm… No idea."

" _YESSS!"_

"Could be Irma from Officer Bayer's squad, if you ask me." First girl snickered. "She was always such a slut…"

Sounded like your death sentence was revoked, after all. Letting out a deep sigh of relief, you buried your face into your hands and took a moment to calm down. If no-one noticed you sneaking out after the bar fight, they should have no reason to think it was you. Emmett was a well known bully in the military police and the last thing you wanted was him to know that you had anything to do with this! He had some personal grudge against Captain Levi and scout regiment overall, so 'scheming with the enemy' was the worst thing to do in his book. " _What was going on in my mind back then anyways?"_ You sighed again. " _I guess I just felt so sorry for him, stupid drunkard me… I don't have anything against him, anyways― Well, maybe that one thing, but it was a long time ago-"_

"[f/n]? Hello?"

"Eh?!" Snapping out of it, you almost jumped when you found a thin framed young girl standing next to you― An auburn hair tied up on a messy bun and those hazel eyes behind the silver rimmed glasses told you it was no-one else but Elise, your fellow officer. She looked at you puzzled, but gave you a warm smile before speaking.

"I'm sorry, did I startled you?" She apologized, giggling a bit at your shocked reaction.

"Yeah, a little bit." You snickered back. "No harm done."

"Dozing off middle of the day, huh?" Elise smiled again, correcting the position of her glasses as she continued. "Heard you guys were out pretty late. But anyways, I just wanted to check in if you got that Yarckel tax report done?"

"Oh, right. Yeah, I have it right here…" You nodded. Elise waited patiently while you patted through your jacket pockets, double checking the inside breast pockets more than a few times. "...Huh? What the-?"

The tax report was gone. Thankfully Elise was very understanding, agreeing that you'd return it the next day— If you'd find it, that is. That little piece of paper just seemed to have vanished into the thin air; no matter how many times you turned your room upside down, it was still nowhere to be found. "That's odd…" You muttered to yourself as you went through the cabinets for the third time. " _When was the last time I saw it..? I knew I had it…"_ You remembered still having the list when you went out with Emmett and the others, and then it hit you― There was only one place where it could be.

* * *

"I always end up doing stupid shit like this… Which I most probably regret later, but no can do…" You muttered to yourself as you carefully opened the window and climbed into the room. " _Pick the lock, get in, find the paper and get out… Simple as that."_ You had done your fair share of shady odd jobs in the past, so you weren't new to stuff like this― But breaking into Captain Levi's bedroom was taking it to another level, so to say. Past as a petty criminal wasn't something you were necessarily proud of, but one had to make a living, right? Signing up to the military was your ticket to a better life, and ever since you had tried your best to stay on good terms with the law. " _Okie dokie… So where could it be..?"_ Careful not to make any sound, you closed the window behind you and took a look around. His bedroom was attached to his office, separated by a door, but both of the rooms had their own separate doors to the hallway as well. You had made sure Captain Levi was away and wouldn't be back in a while, giving you plenty of time for searching the paper, but you still tried to make haste― Longer you stayed in the room, bigger the chances were to get caught.

" _There's a chance I dropped it when I hauled Heichou's drunken ass to the bed… Huh?!"_ You almost couldn't believe your eyes when you saw his bed; " _No way… How it is even possible for someone to make their bed_ _ **that**_ _neatly?!"_ It almost looked like he had washed and ironed all his bed sheets that very morning and spent a very good 30 minutes making sure every single pillow and blanket was perfectly placed on the bed. The whole room was almost unsettlingly neat and organized overall, not a single flake of dust in sight. "... A bit OCD, huh?" You muttered. " _There's no way I'll touch those ridiculously wrinkle free sheets! And if the list was in the bed, he must have_ ―" You were about to take a step forward, but halted as you glanced down; Even the rug fringes were perfectly aligned straight! " _Are you kidding me?! This room is a goddamn minefield!"_ Your little 'in-and-out without leaving a trace' -mission had turned out to be more complicated than expected― If he paid this much attention to the detail, he'd surely notice if something was even minorly out of place. Carefully stepping over the edge of the rug, you tiptoed across the room, continuing your search by scanning the floors. " _It's no use… He must have found it..!"_ You sighed to yourself as you peeked under the bed. " _I guess there's no choice but to get a new list and make up the numbers-"_

 _ ***Click***_

Your heart dropped when you heard the lock of the door click open― Someone was about to enter the room, and that someone had to be no-one else but… " _Heichou! Oh fucking hell..!"_ Screaming curse words inside your mind, you acted without thinking and dove under the bed, barely in time before the door swung open. Holding your breath, you listened how the footsteps made their way across the room, stopping unnervingly close to the bed. " _Holy shit, does he know I'm in here?!"_ You were sure you'd get a heart attack at any moment― If he would take a look under the bed, it would be the end of you. " _Stupid, stupid me! This was a bad idea to begin with..! Yeah, confronting him after all the stupid shit that happened last night would've been pretty damn awkward, but what about this?! Yeah,_ _ **not**_ _awkward_ _ **at all**_ _!"_ For your relief, the footsteps lingered there only for a moment, soon heading over to the other side of the room. You finally found courage to take a little peek from your hiding place, and sure enough, it was the captain himself. " _What is he doing here this early?! He wasn't supposed to be back from supervising the cleaning duty in another hour or so! I hope he just stopped by to pick up something… because if he flops behind his desk to do some paperwork for a few hours, I'll rather-"_ Your mind went completely blank at the very second you realized what Levi was doing; After placing his jacket on the back a chair, he was now opening his harness straps one by one. He stood there his back turned at you, so there was no way he could see you... but when the shirt came off you had to force yourself to look away― If you hadn't been squeezing your hands so tightly over your mouth, you would've squealed at the sight for sure. " _Contain yourself, damn it!"_ You commanded yourself in your mind, trying your best to control your breathing so he wouldn't hear you. " _This isn't time to panic, you've seen half naked men before! But… not him, though."_ Taking another quick peep to… well, you know, to make sure he hasn't noticed you (an obvious lie), you couldn't help but to stare at him. " _Ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner..!"_ First thing that came into your mind to describe him was 'almost ridiculously perfect'. " _Oh geez… I'm going hell for this…"_


	4. Ch4 Highs and Lows

" _OK, I guess now I can add being a peeping tom to my list of illegal activities!"_ You knew that what you were doing was wrong, but what could you do? " _Well I_ _ **could**_ _look away…"_ You could've, but you didn't. All the opposite, you were basically devouring the unaware regiment captain with your eyes! Forcing yourself to take your eyes from him even for a second, you took a moment to calm your racing heart―That sleek but still firmly muscular body would haunt you in your dreams for the rest of your life, that was for sure. " _I'd never think I would end up doing something like this! What next? A murder? Or… a… sexual assault..?"_ Your concentration was slipping once again as you glanced at his direction. For your relief (but also for your disappointment), Levi had already put on a clean shirt and was middle of adjusting the harness straps. You swiftly hid from the sight again and waited until he left, not moving a muscle until you were sure he wasn't coming back. "How low I've sank..? This is ridiculous…" You whimpered as you squeezed from under the bed, relieved you could finally breathe freely again. "The new low… and one of the highlights of my life? Wait! Nope! Forget all about it! This never happened!" Oh no, you'd never forget it and you knew it. No matter how hard you'd try, the image of shirtless Heichou was burned into your mind forever― And what a nice image it truly was~! Now you couldn't help but to think about the last night as a wasted opportunity; " _We were drunk, laying in his goddamn bed together. That kind of combination should according to all the laws of the universe lead to… something! But no… I only do stupid things when there's nothing in it for me, apparently!"_

Your mission was a failure. The list was nowhere to be found, so you retreated the same way you came from and scuffed back to the military police HQ. There was nothing else you could do but to get a new list and scribble some random numbers on it. Pretty low thing to do, but desperate times require desperate actions. The next morning you were about to do just that, making your way across the HQ's courtyard and towards the offices; No-one should be there that early, so you could just grab a new form and go on your merry way. You were just about to past the courtyard main entrance, but what― or more like who― you saw made you froze in place. You felt the blood escape from your face when your eyes locked in with his, and for a moment neither of you said a word.

"Um… Hi there. [l/n], right?" Levi started the conversation somewhat cautiously, occasionally glancing over your shoulder as if to make sure no-one saw the two of you. "Do you have a minute?"

Not wanting to anyone see you in his company either, you nodded and followed him outside the gate. Bolting to the opposite direction without a word did crossed your mind, but maybe it was better just to listen what he had to say; It was a very unlikely scenario, almost impossible one, but you couldn't help but to feel nervous if he had somehow found out that you had broken into his room and was here to confront you about it.

"I'd rather not show my face there for obvious reasons…" Levi explained as you two made your way to a narrow alleyway next to the base, just far enough to hide from curious eyes. "Alright, so… I think this belongs to you." He reached inside his jacket and handed you a slightly crumpled piece of paper.

"Ah! T-t-thanks!" You stuttered surprised as you took the tax list from him. " _He really had it, after all! I never thought he would go through the trouble of returning it, though..!"_ That also explained how he knew your name; You were pretty sure that you never mentioned your name to him, but it didn't take too great detective skills to look it up from the paper.

"And…" Anxiously shifting weight from a feet to another, Levi took a moment to put his words together. His overall presence was calm and collected, but the little things told you he was clearly just as nervous as you were, or possibly even more. "My memories are pretty hazy, and I… I just have to ask…" He lowered his voice as he continued, seemingly trying to avoid your gaze as he spoke. "Did we..? You know..?"

"Did we what?" You blinked confused. "Oh… Oh!" You felt all the heat of your body rush up and onto your face when you realized what he meant. " _Don't tell me he really just asked me that?!"_

"I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable―" He tried to save the situation after seeing how shocked you looked. You didn't clearly just imagine it; Judging by his reaction, your face really had to be flaming red at the moment. The fact that he had noticed it didn't make you feel any less uncomfortable, all the opposite. "It's alright, just forget I even asked-"

"No! No… No, we didn't." You quickly interrupted him, trying to brush off the awkwardness of the situation with a nervous laughter. "I just walked you home, that's all― And, well… fell asleep as well, I guess. That wasn't part of the plan or intentional whatsoever, so sorry about that…"

"No harm done― I guess I should be the one apologizing." This was probably the first time ever you saw him smiling― Even so slightly, but it still was a genuine smile, maybe even a little mischievous one. As a military police officer, you hadn't really had much any interaction with Captain Levi, but those rare times you had seen him he was always looking so severe… even quite intimidating, to be honest. This far he had turned out to be very different from what you had expected. "I doubt I was at my best that night." Levi cringed at the memory, avoiding the eye contact seemingly embarrassed. "I'm sorry that I caused you all that trouble. And… thanks." He gave you another slight smile as he thanked you, preparing to make his leave. "I guess I've taken enough of your time already― Just wanted to return that list and sort out this mess a bit." You followed him with your gaze as he made his way past you and towards to the exit of the alleyway. For your surprise, he halted, taking a short moment to think before turning to look at you again. "And… I'd like to make it up to you. Only if you're up for it, of course― It's completely understandable if you don't want to take a risk of being seen in my company, so no offence taken if you say no."

"Make it up to me?" You asked surprised. "How?"

* * *

" _I honestly have zero idea what he has in mind…"_ You thought to yourself as you locked your room door before heading out. " _Or why I agreed to this in the first place... Almost like I'm asking for trouble."_ Levi had told you to meet him at the northern entryway of the scout regiment base late in the evening, but didn't say what for. " _Oh boy, I almost got in sooooo much trouble, just imagine if anyone would find out that it was me who was with the captain that night? I should definitely stay away from him for now― Hmm? What was that? Oh, you wanna hang out? Sure, I'd love to, just tell me where and when~! It's not like my life will become a living hell_ _ **if someone finds out about this!**_ _Seriously, what the hell is wrong with me?!"_ Although the evening was going to be chilly, you wanted to play it safe and went out without your jacket; It had given you out the last time, so you wouldn't make the same mistake again. Sun was already starting to set when you arrived to the meeting spot― Levi was already there waiting for you, and without further explanations he gestured you to follow him inside the base walls.

"So… What are we exactly doing tonight?" You inquired as you pranced after him.

"You'll see soon enough."

"...Fine. Are you always this mysterious or is it just for today?" You rolled your eyes, taking the hint that continuing your inquiry would be pointless. Levi just chuckled at your words, not commenting on your sneering. Your curiosity grew as he lead you through the base grounds using remote paths, all the way to the scout regiment training yards. When he stopped at the edge of the forest, you still had no clue why he had brought you there. Levi seemed to enjoy keeping you in the dark until the very last moment, leisurely leaning against a tree to examine you. " _Expecting me to get all confused and keep inquiring why you brought me here?"_ You frowned to yourself and crossed your arms over your chest. " _Sorry, not gonna to give you that pleasure. Just whenever you're ready…"_


	5. Ch5 Extra: Two Days of Levi

**As an extra, a sneak peek of Levi's side of the story**

* * *

 **Day 1**

" _Oh fucking hell… My head…"_ Despite being still half asleep, Levi could already tell that he'd have to go through the day with the worst hangover ever. He wasn't exactly famous for a good alcohol tolerance, all the opposite, but this time he really overdid it. Only trying to remember the last night events was a struggle― And all the bits and pieces he could recall just made him want to forget all of it instead. " _Did I really punch that jackass..? Damn it… Erwin won't be happy about that, not at all…"_ Levi was already drifting back to sleep when a low thud accompanied by a shriek startled him; Now wide awake, he found himself staring into a pair of [e/c] eyes.

"I… Uh…" [h/c] haired young woman stuttered as she scuffled up from the floor, looking almost just as confused and shocked as he was. "I'm… I… Sorry, thank you and goodbye!" She shrieked and dashed out of the room before Levi could say a word or even process what the hell was happening!

"Who..?" Levi blinked confused. He had some faint memories about bumping into her when he left from the pub, but what happened after that was a complete mystery. " _Thank you? For what?"_ A peek under the blanket confirmed he was still mostly dressed― That alone didn't rule out all the possibilities of what they could've done last night. Warmth steadily creeped onto his face as he thought about the situation he was in; He had just woken up next to a military police officer, having no idea what happened last night or who exactly she even was. " _Not to mention what all kind of stupid shit I may or may have not done..!"_ Levi cringed at himself. " _Every time I meet a cute girl..! Every goddamn time..! I just_ _ **have to**_ _make a fool of myself!"_

"Good morning." Erwin, who had appeared into the doorway, interrupted his drinker's remorse. "Rough night, I see?" He raised his brow seemingly unimpressed.

"I'm late, I know." Not even bothering to comment his superior's words, Levi sat up on the edge of the bed to snatch his jacket from the floor. He could tell Erwin had something to say, and he doubted it was anything pleasant.

"Do you want to explain yourself or should I go straight to the point?" Erwin finally asked after a moment of silence while Levi put his jacket on and corrected his cravat.

"Knock yourself out." Levi muttered under his breath, everything but excited for the upcoming lecture.

"I'd wish you would avoid getting involved to a petty brawls all together―" Erwin stated coolly as he stepped into the room, closing the door behind him before continuing. "But if you have a compulsive need to punch someone's teeth in, I'd suggest you to choose your target more wisely next time; General wasn't very pleased to hear that scout regiment captain assaulted his nephew." Erwin spoke in a calm manner, but the serious look in his eyes was enough to tell Levi about the severity of the situation. But, to be honest, he had too much of a hangover to even give a shit― And besides, general's nephew or not, the kid was an asshole and got exactly what he deserved. "Levi? Did I make myself clear?" Erwin scowled at Levi, waiting him to say something.

"Yes, very clear." Levi nodded, leisurely flicking his coal black hair back as he finally lifted his gaze. Erwin didn't seem too convinced, sighing to himself and shaking his head as he made his way out. Instead of getting up, Levi crashed back to bed at very moment the door slammed shut. "What a fucking day…" He groaned in annoyance― He had woken up merely 10 minutes ago and was already ready to call it a day. Reaching next to him to grab a blanket, his hand brushed against a crumpled piece of paper that had been hiding under the sheets. "Hm? What's this..?"

* * *

 **Day 2**

" _[l/n], [f/n]..."_ He had heard that name somewhere before, but where? " _Now when I think about it, she looked somehow familiar as well―"_ Levi found himself eyeing the list for the third time within an hour, re-reading the name of its owner over and over again as he tried to figure out why it sounded so familiar. "Who the heck are you..?" He muttered under his breath as he folded the paper back into his pocket. This mystery was going to keep nagging him until he'd find out the answer; He had just spent whole morning cleaning the dorms with the cadet brats, but this '[f/n]' in the back of his mind kept ruining his zen. It was maybe a bit childish, but he couldn't help it. With a deep sigh, Levi grabbed his jacket from the back of a chair and marched out of his room― If he wanted answers, he knew exactly where to start.

After wasting a good 20 minutes of his precious time by standing idle in a musty, old fart smelling room known as the military records, Levi was finally handed the files he came there for. " _99th trainee corps, huh?"_ He read the title of the first folder, leisurely flipping through the pages as he headed back to his office. According to the file, this mysterious new friend of his had done pretty damn well in the trainee corps― And now wasting all her talent in the military police. " _Typical…"_ Levi pouted to himself. " _Why always the best ones..?"_ She got the whole package: Best 3dmg user of her class, excellent leadership skills, top grades from both close-combat and tactical mastery. " _And even the looks if you ask me…"_ Levi smiled shortly to himself. By a quick glance, she was almost too good to be true. " _So tell me, [f/n]... what are you hiding?"_ If Levi had learned anything during his time in the military, it was that the ones who looked best on the paper were always the ones closets full of skeletons. He himself wasn't an exception, and he'd bet that [f/n]'s personal file would confirm she wasn't one either. Finally arriving to his office, Levi locked the door after him and sat behind his desk to take a closer look at the remaining documents. As expected, she wasn't squeaky clean after all; Accused for a petty crime or two in the past, but never convicted for anything. "A little rebel, huh? Hmph, nothing too exceptional, though…" Levi sighed in boredom. He was about to just quickly flip through rest of the file and wrap things up, but the very next page made him freeze.


	6. Ch6 Pressure Test

"[l/n], [f/n]... Awfully young to be a commanding officer, aren't you?" Levi finally started the conversation after a nerve wrecking moment of silence.

"What?" He really caught you off guard by the question, but you quickly managed to put your act back together. "I guess I'll take it as a compliment; I need to hurry up if I want to become a captain at your age, though."

"Touché" Levi smirked. "Didn't mean it as an insult. I'm just curious... You have quite an exceptional military career, that's all."

"Exceptional, huh..? And what do you know about my career?" You gave him an unimpressed look. If he had something to say, he should just spit it out.

"Let's see… You graduated from the 99th training corps in 845, easily joining to military police as the best of your class. You fought in the colossal titan attack during that very same year, and then after 5 years of steadily climbing the ranks you fought in Trost where you were promoted to commanding officer right there in the field."

"You looked me up? That's not creepy at all…" It was really starting get difficult to keep your cool act together. He had obviously read your file, but why go through all that trouble in the first place? "But yeah, it's pretty handy when almost half of your superiors drop dead at the same time―" You stated sarcastically. "You'll just fly through the ranks because you happen to be the best of the worst. But enough about that, I doubt that you brought me all the way here just to discuss about my career?"

"I didn't." Taking a hint that you were less than interested about the topic, Levi straightened his posture as he headed over to a tree not far from you. You hadn't noticed it before, but now you could see there was something hidden behind it. "According to your file, what ensured your place as a number one of 99th trainee corps were your 3dmg skills―"

" _Are those..?"_ You peeked over his shoulder to see better when Levi revealed the hidden items under the burlap.

"I was thinking we could find out how much your skills have rusted during these past years you've been busy collecting taxes and arresting local drunkards." He glanced at you over his shoulder, a vicious smirk on his face.

"Are you serious?" You gasped― Sure enough, what you had in front of you was a pair of 3dmgs, one for you and one for him.

"How does it look like? What, are you scared?" Levi, who was already attaching the 3dmg to his harness, gave you another mischievous look.

"Me? Never." No, not necessarily scared, but pretty damn nervous! It had been too long since you had a chance to practice with 3dmg, so your skills definitely weren't as sharp as they used to. Back in training corps you were confident― even somewhat cocky― when it came to your skills in the air, but you weren't feeling so sure anymore. " _Captain Levi is from a bit different league, to say at least! Not like I have to prove anything to him, but that did sound like a challenge..!"_ Mustering all your strength to keep your hands from shaking, you grabbed the scabbards and began to gear up as well. " _Why I'm this nervous, anyways? What does it matter what he thinks about me?"_ You secretly scowled at him. " _I'm just another good-for-nothing, lazy ass military police piece of-"_

"Ready?"

"Hm? Oh, yes." You quickly put on a straight face after you realized that you were still glaring at him with a sour look when he glanced to your direction. "You sure know how to show girl a good time― First an interrogation and now a pressure test." You said as you straightened your back, all ready to go.

"I… Uh…" Levi looked somewhat flustered by your words, unable to come up with a response― It was difficult not to smirk to the fact how easily you had destroyed his almost condescending act.

"Hey― I was just kidding." Unable to hide your amusement any longer, you gave him a mischievous grin accompanied by a wink before dashing up into the air. If only judging by the very first few minutes, you had to admit that your performance was anything else but convincing; Even with a headstart, it took no time for Levi to catch up with you. You made some real rookie mistakes due to your nervousness, but after a while you started to feel more and more confident. Unlike you had expected, Levi didn't comment on your futile start, but instead gave you constructive criticism when you needed it most. He had been right about one thing, though; It didn't took too many rounds around the forest when you already felt a need to land on a tree branch to catch your breath.

"You're getting a hang of it― I'm almost impressed." He smirked as he landed next to you on the branch.

"Almost impressed?" You grinned, swiping sweat from your forehead. "Thanks, I guess… But I admit that I really am out of shape..! It's funny how quickly you forget how intense working with 3dmg is; I can only imagine how stuck my back will be tomorrow morning!"

"True." Levi smiled shortly, still staring into the darkness of the forest. "But, you know…" Turning his attention to you, he took a step closer, gesturing you to turn your back at him. "If I may..?" After you had hesitatingly obeyed, he carefully placed his hand onto your shoulder and other behind your lower back, gently tilting your body posture backwards. "It's alright, just lean against my hand― I'm not going to let you fall." He assured as he felt your body tense, shifting his hand from your shoulder down to your waist to correct your posture even more. "There; Leaning backwards like this should take some pressure off from the back, but it requires quite a bit of practise to hold up the posture up in the air as well. It may feel a bit unstable at first, but..." You tried to listen, but his words merged into unreadable babbling; All you could think of was his hand on your hips and that soft breath on your neck. Every passing second made you more and more aware of the deadly fall below you― Although you weren't going to admit it to yourself, the dangerous part of the situation just made it all feel even more intense. "...Got it?"

"Y-yeah..!" You stuttered as you snapped back to the reality, nodding confidently although you didn't hear even half of what he just had explained to you.

"Good. We should still have time to-" Levi was about to suggest trying the new technique in practise, but a voice calling out for him from the edge of the forest made both of you jump. "Damn it…" Levi cursed under his breath, glancing down into the darkness. "Looks like I have to go."

"...It's fine…" You managed to whimper― When both of you were startled, Levi had instinctively wrapped his arm around your waist to ensure you wouldn't lose your balance, pulling you so close to him that his chest was now pressed against your back.

"I trust you can find your way back?" He asked, finally releasing his grasp. "Too bad we had to cut this short."

"It's alright, really." You spun around to give him as reassuring smile as possible, trying your best to hide the fact that your legs felt like jello. "I'll be fine."

You watched him effortlessly swing himself down to the forest floor, disappearing into the darkness of the night after glancing up to your direction one last time. As you waited a couple of minutes that he and whoever was down there with him would leave, you couldn't help but to ponder the events of this very unusual evening― Why he went through all the trouble to set up something like this? Not mentioning how many rules he must've broke: 3dmg usage outside the combat situations was strictly controlled, meaning that not just anyone could march to the armory and snatch a gear set when they pleased. " _Yeah, he wanted to make up for the alcohol fumed first impression he gave of himself, but isn't this bit too much..?"_ You thought to yourself as you swung yourself down as well. " _Returning the tax list and an apology alone had been more than enough― Not that I'm complaining..!"_ Something about the whole situation kept nagging you, no matter how many times you told yourself to let it go while you took off the gear and left it back to the same spot Levi had originally hid them. " _He didn't say anything like it, but this whole thing felt almost like… a date?"_


	7. Ch7 Wishful Thinking

" _Just forget it. There's no way it was a date. If it was, he would've surely said something about it, right?"_ It had been two days since the secret 3dmg session with Levi, but you simply couldn't get it off your mind… or him. " _Wishful thinking. That's what this is. There aren't many girls in this city who wouldn't give anything for a date with the captain― The ones who aren't intimidated by him, that is― And I honestly don't think I'd be first in the line to get such an opportunity!"_ You sighed to yourself. "I'm just being stupid…"

"Stupid? Why?"

"Eh?!" You had been deepened into your thoughts, totally forgetting that you were middle of a card game and unintentionally muttered some of your thoughts out loud― You glanced up from your cards to receive a weirded out looks from the cadets you were playing with, both of them waiting you to explain yourself. "I... Uh… Just wondering why I even bother playing with you guys! Stakes are ridiculously low, if you ask me..!"

"Well sorry, but this is all you gonna get from a cadet's paycheck." Other one of the cadets, Marlo Freundenberg, huffed and turned his gaze back to his cards. "I'm not that into gambling anyways… During the working hours, especially." He added.

"Ugh… What's the point, then..?" Letting out a disappointed sigh as you threw your cards on the table, you stood up to grab your rifle which was leaning against the storage crates next to you.

"What? Where are you going?" Marlo blinked in confusion.

"I'll take a walk." You stated, grabbing a rusk from the paper bag on the table before turning away to leave. "I want to see the expedition launch, anyways."

"B-but… We're supposed to be in duty..?"

"You are." Snickering to yourself, you gave the duo a lazy wave of goodbye. "You can manage an hour or so without me. Think this as an opportunity to show what you're made of~! You and… Eh…"

"Hitch Dreyse." Replied a sour voice dryly behind you.

You could hear their grumbles of irritation as you went on your merry way, but you just simply didn't give a crap about it. This was how it always had been: Superior officers pushing around their subordinates. Compared to your fellow officers, you considered yourself to be quite upright with the cadets (most of the time, at least), but every now and then you gave yourself a permission to cut some slack. Main street was already packed with people when you arrived to the scene― There was still a good 10 minutes before the expedition launch, but nearly all of the scout regiment units were already on their horses and ready to go. Gnawing on the rusk, you squeezed through the crowd trying to find a good spot to watch the launch. Subconsciously, though, you were looking for someone specific from the scout regiment lines; Only when you reached the first squad of the formation you finally halted. Leaning against a lamp post, you quietly examined the situation― In the first squad were, of course, Commander Erwin Smith and the team leaders with their squads, not forgetting the special operations squad. Captain Levi was having a conversation with Erwin, most probably discussing about the details of the upcoming mission. As if feeling your eyes on him, Levi glanced over his shoulder to your direction.

" _Oh geez… I hope he didn't catch me staring at him..! OK, just play it cool, act like you didn't even notice him..."_ Your 'cool act' crumbled almost immediately when Levi wrapped up his conversation with Erwin and turned around, now staring straight at you. You gave him a nervous smile and a nod as a greeting― But for your surprise, instead of returning the gesture, Levi briefly checked his surroundings before gesturing you to come over to him. " _What? He wants me to go over there? For reals?"_ You frowned to yourself. " _In the broad daylight and literally middle of the street… What happened to the part of 'better not to be seen in each other's company'?!"_ You anxiously shifted weight from one leg to another, scanning your surroundings for any military police members. Levi was starting to get impatient, raising his eyebrow in annoyance as he waited for you to make up your mind. "Damn it… Oh what the hell!" You cursed under your breath and squeezed through the crowd once again. Why you should care about what a bag of turd like Emmett would think about you? If he'd ever even find out, that is.

"Here to watch the launch, I see." Raven haired man stated as you walked up to him. "Or did you come all the way here just to wish me good luck?" He added, giving you a somewhat mischievous look.

"Yeah, sure." You sneered sarcastically. "But I think that humanity's strongest soldier can manage without a kiss for good luck, or am I wrong?"

"I suppose." Levi raised his brow slightly, apparently somewhat amused by your words.

"You know, actually… There's something I wanted to ask you; Tell me why you arranged that little 3dmg session of ours?" You asked, crossing your arms over your chest. "You didn't have to do it― What was it about, really?"

"Do I need a reason?" He stated in an uninterested tone, clearly trying to dodge the question. At first you felt persistent not to let the matter slide that easily, but how confident Levi looked about himself made you decide not to even waste your breath― He had again that smug look on his face, as if he had the whole situation already figured out. Part of you found it irritating when he gave you that look, but there was something more to it; You _wanted_ to feel annoyed by how his lips curled even so slightly to that impish smirk of his, damn hell, you wanted to _**hate**_ that stupid-ass gleam he had in his eyes when he looked at you like that! ...But you didn't. You were forced to turn your gaze away when you felt the heat creep onto your cheeks, now only annoyed by the fact how much effect that single look had on you.

"Well… I guess not." You sighed, rolling your eyes to make sure he knew how dissatisfied you were with his answer. While trying to cool off the warmth from your cheeks, you turned your attention to his horse instead, giving her a few rubs as a greeting. For a moment neither of you said a word. You were too wrapped up in your thoughts to even notice the awkward silence, your mind wandering back to that evening few days ago; To be honest, before all of this you had thought Captain Levi was quite an intimidating character, but something had changed― His presence made you feel calm, secure… But that in the other hand gave you some very mixed feelings. " _How I can feel like this― With him, from all of the guys?"_ You found yourself secretly glancing up at him, gloomy thoughts stirring up a nasty feeling down in your gut. It was a mixture of guilt and grief; Those feelings had become too familiar to you during your recovery after the battle of Trost, and now it all was coming back to you again. Levi had noticed the change in your mood, now quietly studying you as he tried to figure out what you were thinking about. "What's it like out there?" You quickly changed the subject before he'd ask you about it, turning your attention back to his horse. "Outside the walls, I mean."

"What's it like?" Levi repeated your words in a pondering tone, a bit surprised about the question. "You don't really notice it before you go outside the walls, but the air smells different― It's difficult to explain… And now when I said it out loud, it just sounds pretty stupid." He turned his gaze away, but you could tell he was trying to hide the fact he was quietly smiling to himself.

"It's not stupid." You assured, offering the rest of the rusk to his horse― Which she gobbled up in no time, now checking out if you had any more treats on you. "Sounds pretty cool, actually. I wonder if I'll ever-" A horn indicating the expedition launch made you jump in place, telling you it was time for you to skitter out of the way if you didn't want to get trampled by dozens of horses. "Oh dang it..! Gotta go! Bring me something nice from the outside~!" You chanted jokingly as you turned away to leave, waving Levi goodbye as you went on your way. He looked like he was about to say something, but only gave you a smile instead when you disappeared back into the crowd once again.

As you watched the every last scout regiment member disappear through the wall gates, a strange feeling of unrest flushed over you― You had lived your whole life inside the walls, but they had never felt so tall until now. Just before the wall gates slammed shut, a gentle breeze of air flowed in, sweeping over the dusty street as if just to tease you. Without giving it another thought, you dashed towards the closest garrison entrance, almost tripping onto your own feet more than once as you rushed up the stairs, dodging shrieking and cursing garrison members on your way up. Lungs burning and covered in sweat, you finally made it to the top― The wall area was mainly for garrison members only, but you doubted anyone would really give a shit about you being there. Dropping onto your knees from exhaustion, you took a moment to catch your breath and admire the view in front of you. Scout regiment was nowhere to be seen, already disappeared behind the hills and forests far away in the horizon.

"Holy shit… Captain Shorty was right." You sneered to yourself as you swiped your sweaty forehead. "The air really smells different, even just up here…" Hugging your knees against your body, you stared into the distance― The day when you signed up to the trainee corps, your goal was clear; You spent those three years busting your ass, spending nearly every waking hour either training like hell or devouring every military tactic book you could get your hands on… All that just to ensure your place in the top 10 of your class. You had never doubted your choice to become a military police officer― Not until now.


	8. Ch8 Sweetheart

"Beautiful, isn't it?"

"Wha-?!" You shrieked in surprise― You had been so wrapped up in your thoughts that you hadn't even notice Commander Pixis next to you until now. You ended up spending the rest of the day up on the wall, just staring into the distance and thinking. How long he had been standing there, you had no idea. "I… I'm sorry, Commander, I know I'm not supposed to-" You hastily explained as you scuffled up, but Pixis quickly interrupted you.

"It's fine, don't worry about it." Garrison commander chuckled. "I often come up here just to collect my thoughts, to relax… It's a good place for that." He smiled as he pulled out a flask from his pocket and popped the cork open. After taking a long gulp of his drink, he handed the bottle to you― Still unable to make up your mind of what to think of this, you accepted the gesture somewhat confused. The strong smell of liquor made the hair on the back of your neck stood up when you brought the flask up to your lips, but you took a small sip anyway. "[l/n], right?" He asked as you handed the flask back, chuckling a bit at your efforts not to cringe at the taste of the drink. "So, feel a need to lighten your heart? I don't mean to pry, but…" Pixis gave you a meaningful but sympathetic look as he spoke. "You looked kind of troubled when I found you here."

"What?" You blinked surprised. Pixis really was a sharp-eyed old coot, you had to admit. "No, I'm alright― I just have a lot on my mind, that's all." You gave him a slight smile before turning your gaze back to the horizon. The view was beautiful indeed; Sun was already quickly setting behind the mounds and hills in the distance, painting the sky into a rainbow of warm colors.

"Is that so?" He chuckled― The slight raise of a brow told you he was having a hard time believing you. "They'll be back in… 3 days, wasn't it? The scout regiment, that is." Pixis answered to the confused look of yours. "They'll be fine, don't worry about them."

"Scout regiment..?" You frowned, now staring at him in disbelief. "Why would I-"

"Why?" Garrison commander repeated the question, a somewhat mischievous spark in the corner of his eye. "Because of that sweetheart of yours."

"My _**what**_ **?!** " At this point you didn't know if you should feel more awkward or creeped out. There was a hint of truth in his words, but you weren't just ready to admit it― Even to yourself. "No, no, no..! There's definitely no sweetheart anywhere! Not here or not there!" You hastily explained, gesturing towards both inside and outside the walls in a lively manner.

"Oh, don't you even try and deny it― The longing of a heart, I know when I see one." Old man laughed and took one and then another gulp from the flask before continuing. "Ahh, young love..! Is there anything better?"

"What are you talking about?" Ignoring the heat on your cheeks, you crossed your arms over your chest and gave the garrison commander a stern look. "Just drop it, I am **not** in love with him! We barely even- I- I… Oh dear." Only now realising your own words, you quickly swatted your hand over your mouth; What you just had slipped out made the smirk on the garrison commander's face only grow wider.

"So you have someone special in your mind after all?"

"No! Or… I don't know, maybe…" You groaned, lowering your gaze to rub your temples― This conversation was really wearing you out. Who would have guessed that one day you'd be discussing about the complexity of your romantic life with who else but Garrison Commander Pixis? That was a conversation you weren't ready for yet! "You know…" You sighed as you began slowly dragging yourself towards the closest staircase. "Life is stupid sometimes."

"It sure is~!" You heard him laugh as you slouched the very first few steps down. "But no worries, you'll get used to it!"

Last rays of sunshine had disappeared behind the horizon and the chilly night air was creeping in. No matter how hard you tried, you couldn't get the old coot's words from your mind as you made your way through the darkening city.

* * *

"Damn Commander Pixis… And damn Captain Levi..!" You muttered under your breath as you marched down the hall and towards the living quarters of the military police HQ. " _I had a good thing going― The shit dust was finally starting to set, life was simple and good… Note to myself: Mind your own business and you'll do fine. If you'll ever see a drunken, ridiculously hot guy tottering middle of the street at night, just keep walking."_ It was already quite late in the evening and most of the folk had retreated to their bunks a good while ago― After not encountering more than a few souls when returning to the HQ, you almost jumped out of your skin when someone ran into you at the living quarters doorway.

"Whoops! I'm sorry, I didn't-" Reddish haired girl hastily apologized, almost dropping her glasses in the hustle. "I wasn't looking where I- Oh! [f/n]..!"

"Running around like a headless chicken again, Elise?" You snickered at your friend, reaching down to grab the papers from the floor that had slipped from her grasp as she bumped into you. "Looks like Dawk is busting your butt for reals."

"Y-yeah, I guess so." Elise laughed somewhat nervously, correcting her glasses again.

"Is… something wrong?" At first you thought it was just your imagination, but something felt off― She was clearly avoiding the eye contact when you handed the papers to her, nervously fiddling with a loose strand of hair the whole time.

"What? Oh, no..! It's fine." Elise shook her head, not taking her eyes off from the papers in her hands. "I just… I'm sorry, I need to get these reports on the commander's desk before he leaves the office―" She gave you a timid smile before rushing past you. "Gotta run, good night!"

"What the..?" You furrowed your brow as you watched her skitter down the hallway and out of sight. She had looked surprised― almost shocked― when she realized it was you who she bumped into. The way she acted was really out of character, to say at least; Elise was a bit quirky and often in a hurry running Dawk's errands, but you had never seen her seemingly so nervous. " _This can't be good… definitely not good. She was clearly avoiding me! But why?"_ An unnerving feeling stirring up in your gut, you continued your way up to your room. " _Elise is really the worst liar ever― If she hadn't skittered away so quickly, I bet I would've been able to-"_ Just about to reach for the keys in your pocket, you halted when you found your room door slightly ajar. You could swear you'd never forget to lock the door, and few cracks on the wood around the lock were enough to ensure this wasn't the case this time either. After cautiously pushing the door fully open, you stood at the doorway for a few seconds before slowly walking in.

"Great… Why didn't I see this coming?" Letting out a deep sigh, you took a moment to examine the destruction; Your whole room was trashed, all your belongings either torn apart or scattered around the floor. "Well then… Looks like I'm fucked."


	9. Ch9 Taking a Stand

" _You could hear a pin drop…"_

In this time of the morning the hallway was usually filled with cheerful chatter, everyone talking about the upcoming assignments of the day or sharing the latest gossips― Today wasn't one of those days. Everyone stood neatly in the line, not saying a word.

" _I'm about to get lynched and you bastards know it―"_ You furrowed your brow as you imperceptibly scanned your colleagues. " _Thanks a lot for the warning, guys..!"_ Betrayal had a sour taste, but even if you tried, you couldn't really blame them. " _Pathetic as it is, it's the law of the human nature; Everyone's just trying to save their own skin."_ No-one had said a word to you, trying their best not to even glance at your direction. " _All this only because they are so afraid that big piece of turd. Give me a break..."_ Emmett thought himself as a big bad wolf of the military police; Feared and respected criminal mastermind who ran the whole show. Only the thought made you sneer― He was the biggest bully of your regiment, sure, but that was all he was. A jackass with a huge ego. Military police regiment was corrupted as hell, a honeypot that attracted the greediest and most foul spirited people to it. If someone would tell you Emmett was the worst of them, you'd just laugh in their face.

"Good morning, [f/n]~!"

" _And here we go…"_ You'd think that feeling the arm of the-turd-ass Emmett wrap around your shoulders would make you nervous, but at the moment you were just fighting the urge to roll your eyes. Unlike most of the folk in the room, you weren't afraid of him― You had put up with his shit this far only because you didn't have the energy to deal with the possible consequences. All you wanted was to be left alone and do your work in peace― Which seemed to be no longer an option.

"There's been some really weird rumours going around lately―" Emmett chuckled, giving an unnecessary hard pat on your back before stepping away from your side and to in front of you. "You've probably heard about them too?"

"Maybe." You sighed, keeping your gaze down.

"Maybe?" He gave you a nasty glare that already told you more than enough about what he was about to say. "Funny. Because I think you know a lot more than the rest of us." Already standing way too close to comfort, he leaned even closer to make sure you'd be forced to give him your undivided attention. "Or maybe it wasn't you who was talking with that prick middle of the street yesterday? Maybe I was mistaken? But geez, it really looked awfully much like you, you know? And you two seemed sooooo familiar with each other..!" Emmett snarled.

"I'm sorry."

"Oh? So it was you?" He mocked. "Too bad, but I don't think that a simple 'sorry' is going to make this problem go away-"

"That's not what I meant." You added calmly. "I'm sorry… For **THIS**!" With all your might, you bashed your head straight into his face, dropping Emmett onto his knees to the floor. For a good two seconds you saw stars yourself, but the sight of Emmett squeezing his bleeding nose and crying in pain made you quickly feel a lot better. "Oh wait― I don't think I'm feeling sorry after all! You deserved that..! And a lot more if you ask me!" You snapped at him.

"You stupid bitch!" Emmett howled as he struggled back onto his feet, face twisted in both pain and anger. "I'll end you, I swear-!"

"Oh please..!" You gave him an unimpressed look just to taunt him. "Unlike you, some of us have actually earned our places in here; So I dare you... come and try!"

* * *

"What the hell, [l/n]?!" Nile bashed his fist against the desk surface. "First thing in the morning… a goddamn fight? I'd expect something like that from Emmett, but not from **you**!"

"Is that so? So tell me why **I'm** the one who's in here and not _**him**_?" You scowled at your commander. "Oh, that's right, that jackass is the general's nephew, how stupid of me to forget that!" You sneered sarcastically.

"Not another word!" Commander snapped at you. "Do you have any idea of what kind of situation you have put me in?"

You opened your mouth to answer, but the sudden strike of pain from the split lip made you flinch. Emmett had managed to throw a few reasonable punches at you; A split lip and few bumps and scratches were small price to pay compared to what you had done to his mug― and more than anything, to his ego. Deciding it was better not to say anything after all, you just silently glared at Nile from your spot across his desk.

"[l/n], you are one of my most valued officers―" Nile took a deep breath, then letting out even a deeper sigh. "But this... this little… dispute between you and-"

"Most valued my ass!" You almost shouted as you sprung up from the chair. "A little _dispute_?!" You had no idea what you even had expected― It was clear Nile wasn't going to do anything. He even had a nerve to tell you how much he valued you, as if it meant something. "This is a joke…" You hissed between clenched teeth. "This whole goddamn regiment… it's a joke!"

"Enough!" Nile's eyes widened in surprise and anger as he heard your words.

"I agree! Enough is enough..! Run this ape circus how you please―" Furiously ripping your jacket off from your back and swatting the damn thing onto Nile's desk, you gave him one last glare before marching out of the door. "But count me out! I'm out of here!"

* * *

 **Levi's POV**

"Are you done grubbing in the mud or should we go ahead?"

" _Ha-ha_ , very funny."

"I wasn't joking…" Levi sighed in boredom, glancing over his shoulder at the Section Commander Hange who was busy scraping moss― or something― from the giant tree roots.

"What do you think we come here to do? Fight titans for fun?" Hange chuckled and shook her head, handing another moss sample to her assistant. "Saving humanity one titan at the time? That wouldn't work. We're here to- No, wait-! Moblit, could you tell Captain Shorty why we're here?"

"Our mission is to explore and study-"

"I know why we're here." Levi gave the duo an annoyed glare. "I just hope you could 'explore and study' a bit more faster? We're sitting ducks out here…"

"And that's why you're here!" Hange cheered happily as she struggled back onto her feet, gesturing Levi to join her. "C'mon, just at least try to enjoy yourself! I bet even you'd be amazed on what kind of secrets nature has in store for us!"

"...I'll pass." Section commander shitty-glasses covered from head to toe in mud and god knows what didn't exactly make the offer look very tempting. Letting out another bored sigh, Levi turned his gaze back to the horizon; No titans in sight. Not that he wished for a battle― No, that would be immature and dangerous... but a some kind of a distraction would be welcomed. Two more days and they'd be back inside the walls again; First time in a very long time, he actually looked forward to it. "I wonder how she's doing…" Levi muttered under his breath. After catching himself quietly smiling to himself like some simple minded fool, he quickly tried shook the thought from his head.

"Hey shorty, take a look at these acorns~! Have you ever-"

"I don't give a shit about your acorns!"

* * *

 **Back to Reader's POV**

"6 years… 6 years of service and this is what I get? Stabbed in the back?" You hissed as you marched through the Stohess district gates and towards the inner capital. "Dawk can go to hell..! During all these years I never took a single day off, but that doesn't make me his goddamn lapdog!" As expected, after your outburst Nile had done everything he could to make you stay― It was already too late for that, his pleas falling on deaf ears. Your mind made up, you had collected the very few valuable belongings of yours and stormed out of the HQ without another word. Tugging the knapsack onto a better position over your shoulder, you continued your way through the sunny city. The reality of the situation hadn't completely sunk in yet, but you already felt a feeling of anxiety swelling deep down in your gut, making every step heavier as you proceed on your journey. For a half of a decade you had dedicated your life to the military police, making sure you had no time to even bear a thought for anything else but your work― Now you were about to have more time in your hands than you knew what to do with. Quite a drastic change to your life, to say at least. What were you going to do? Where would you go? You didn't have an answer to the first question and the second one didn't leave you up with too many options to choose from; " _There's only one place where to go…"_

After hours and hours of walking, you finally reached your destination: Arenaria, a village in the southeast area of wall Sina, surrounded by fields and forest. Taking a carriage instead of walking did cross your mind once or twice, but in all honesty you simply didn't want to arrive to your destination too quickly. Taking a deep breath, you made your way down the cobblestone path and towards the lonely house on the outskirts of the town. Atmosphere was quickly growing dusky; The dim glow of candles and gas lamps began slowly light up behind the windows of the village houses, but one of them remained dark. Walking across an unkept, weed filled yard, you halted at the heavy wooden door, taking one last deep breath before letting yourself in. Rusty hinges let out a low creak as you pushed the door open― After all these years, it was finally time for you to say those words you had been avoiding for so long:

"I'm home."


	10. Ch10 Coping Mechanism

_*Knock-knock-knock*_

" _Ugh… just go away…"_ No matter how much you silently prayed to be left alone, the knocking at the door still persisted. "Please… I have zero interest to deal with the nosy neighbours at the moment…" You whimpered, squeezing a pillow over your head to muffle the annoyingly loud knocking sound that echoed in the room. When you didn't answer the door, the knocking soon turned into an outright hammering. "Oh for fuck's sake..! Fine..! **Fine!** " Very much annoyed and desperately wanting to get rid of the intruder, you finally scuffled up from the living room couch and marched to the door. "What?!" You snapped angrily as you swung the door open in a furious manner.

For a second you couldn't get a word out of your mouth, but neither did he; You and Captain Levi looked equally shocked as you stared each other in the doorway, he more than anything stunned by your furious way of greeting visitors.

"Wow―" Levi blinked confused as he saw your blasted appearance. "You look terrible."

"Eh?!" Still having hard time to believe who was standing at your doorstep, you just stared at Levi dumbfounded, unable to process his words. "What..? Terrible..?! Oh geez, thanks!" You gave him a stoic look. "That was exactly what I needed― So thank you again, and excuse me…" You were about to retread back inside and slam the door shut, but Levi prevented this by jabbing his foot between the door and the frame.

"I heard what happened―" He stated casually as if forcing the door open and squeezing in wasn't improper in any way― Now inside the house, Levi took a short moment to groom his appearance, making sure that his clothes didn't get wrinkled during his rather impractical entrance. "But honestly, I had a hard time to believe that you and that asshole actually went and beat the shit out of each other." He continued, raising his brow as he examined the faded bruises on your face. As always, his expressionless demeanor made it very difficult to tell what was going on inside his head; The way those steel-blue eyes carefully studied you made it impossible for you to keep up the eye contact without blushing, so you quickly turned your gaze away.

"What can I say? Had to get it off from my bucket list as long as I had a chance." You shrugged lazily and flopped back on the couch. "Emmett was always a jerk― But enough about that, how about if you'd tell me why you're here?"

"Do I need a reason?" He muttered in an uninterested tone, now scanning the room with his gaze― Spending the last few days swelling in self-pity and not exactly expecting any visitors, cleaning the house had been the last thing in your mind. You had taken care of only the mere necessities to make the place at least somewhat livable, leaving major part of the house untouched; Levi didn't hide his disgust as his eyes traveled from the dust covered floors up to the spiderwebs on the ceiling.

"Oh?" You frowned at his answer. "Let's see, you popped up here uninvited and forcefully entered my home… yeah, I'd say you **do** need a reason!"

"Damn this place is filthy..." Completely ignoring your words, Levi marched across the room and over to the window, filling the dark room with bright daylight as he pulled the curtains open. "And it stinks in here― Don't tell me it's you?"

"Uh… I don't know..?" A quick sniff on your clothes implied he could be right. "Maybe..?" You chuckled nervously, kicking the empty wine bottle under the couch while he wasn't looking.

"Do us both a favor and take a bath." Levi stated boldly, making it sound more like a command than a request. "Don't worry― I'll be here." He assured, not even glancing at your direction as he kept working on opening the jammed window sash.

"Don't worry..? Tch..!" You rolled your eyes as you repeated his words. "You just come here and start bossing me around?" You sighed under your breath as you stood up and sluggishly began dragging yourself to the direction of the bathroom. "You have some nerve, I'll give you that."

* * *

 **Levi's POV**

Levi secretly glanced at [f/n]'s direction as she went on her way, mumbling and cursing under her breath. Only after he heard the bathroom door closing, he finally turned his attention back to the jammed window― After a few more tugs, he finally got the sash up. A breeze of fresh air flowed in, cleansing the musty atmosphere of the room instantly. The house was in a need of some serious cleanup, but even a bigger mess was its owner. [f/n] was a person with a difficult past― even a tragic one― who had just lost what he would guess had been her 'coping mechanism' for the past half a decade: Her job. Levi had dedicated his life to scout regiment, but even he wasn't half a workaholic [f/n] was. Only a quick look at the military police records told him she'd been trying to drown herself to work, not even having a single day off since her return to work after the colossal titan attack.

" _Then suddenly throw it away, just like that?"_ Levi furrowed his brow, slowly pacing around the house as he pondered about the situation. He didn't know the very details, but of what he had heard it sure sound like she had a some kind of a mental breakdown which then resulted to her resigning. "What was she thinking? Silly brat…" He muttered under his breath. " _No… What was_ _ **I**_ _thinking? I barely even know her, but… here I am."_ Levi had planned on seeing her after returning from the expedition, but barging over to her place like this..? To be honest, hearing the rumors about [f/n] vanishing after leaving her job made him worry― If she hadn't been marked as a property owner in her files, he wouldn't have been able to find her either. Although he didn't want to admit it, Levi saw a lot of himself in her.

* * *

 **Back to Reader's POV**

"Alright, I'm ready―" You groaned as you returned to the living room after taking a bath. You had changed on a fresh set of clothes, but as ironic as it was, you had nothing else to wear than your military clothing― You'd have to do some serious clothing shopping, and soon..! "If something still stinks in here, I can guarantee it's not-" Forgetting what you were about to say, you halted in the doorway when you realized the room was empty. In this case empty didn't just mean a missing scout regiment captain, but also half of the furniture. "What the-?! Levi! What's the meaning of this?!"

"It's _Captain_ Levi." He quickly corrected you. The voice came from outside― The wide open front door hinted that the culprit was most probably in the front yard, and soon enough Levi appeared to the doorway.

"I'm no longer part of the military, so I'll call you how I please." You pouted at him when he returned from the outside. "You didn't answer to my question, what the heck are you doing? And what's up with the… the..? Uh..?" Not sure what to call his current look, you just gestured at the scarves he was wearing, one on his head and other covering his mouth. His jacket was resting on the back rest of the couch, one of the very few remaining items in the room.

"What? This?" Levi gave you an unimpressed look as if the answer was obvious. "Tch, I don't want to get dirty― Like I said, this place is a mess."

"Riiiiight… Okay, another 'stupid' question; Where are you taking all my stuff?" You asked with a frown, crossing your arms over your chest as you watched Levi roll up the living room carpet.

"To outside." He stated coolly, hauling the carpet roll over his shoulder before heading back out. "How I'm supposed to clean the floors with all this stuff in here..?"

"Clean the floors..?" Why the heck Captain Levi of the scout regiment, a.k.a humanity's strongest soldier, was about to clean your floors? This was one extremely confusing day, that was for sure. "...Why you're going to do that?" You blinked slowly in confusion before quickly rushing after him. "And don't you dare to say you don't need a reason, because you totally do!"

"They're dirty." Levi muttered after a short moment of silence, clearly hesitating a bit before answering. "So, how it is? Are you going to just stand there like a fool or will you give me a hand?"


	11. Ch11 Healing Process

"Gah! This is hard work..!" You whimpered, flopping on the porch steps to rest your aching feet and back. " _I didn't think we'd clean the whole house! Maybe the living room and kitchen, but the upstairs too..?"_ Wiping sweat from your forehead, you took a moment to enjoy the cool late evening air. "Thank god we're almost done- _Ouch_!" Your wailing was interrupted by a firm smack on the top of your head― Glancing over your shoulder, you found Levi standing behind you, holding the mop threateningly high like he was about to give another whack any second.

"We aren't done in any time soon if you keep slacking off." He gave you an annoyed glare as he pulled the scarf off from his face, clicking his tongue as he continued. "Tch… I wouldn't normally accept sloppy work like this, but we only have so much time. Believe me, if you were one of my regiment brats, you'd be scrubbing that floor with your toothbrush until the sunrise."

"Ugh…" You believed him, for sure. "I'm so happy I'm not one of them… Uargh!"

"Less talk, more work." Levi commanded after another mop whack onto your head. "Didn't they teach you any discipline in the MP? Hmph, figures…" He sighed in an unimpressed tone, proceeding on poking your ribs with the mop handle.

"H-hey..! Stop that!" You laughed, trying to brush the stick away from you. "Seriously..! It tickles, damn it!" Levi did stop what he was doing, but the way he looked at you caught your attention― He stared at you with a somewhat flustered look on his face, as if he didn't know how to react. When he snapped out of it and realized you were staring straight back at him, Levi quickly broke the eye contact, pulling the scarf back onto his face as he headed back inside without another word. " _He is indeed a strange one―"_ You couldn't help but to smile to yourself. " _Not in a bad way, though..!"_ Although you hadn't admitted it to him― or even to yourself― for the last few days you had been emotionally in a really bad place. Today was something that felt like the first good day in a long time, and it was all thanks to him. Struggling back up and onto your feet, you quickly followed him inside. An old, murky house had transformed into a warm, cozy place you could maybe one day truly call a home. Only a few years ago even the thought of stepping a foot inside that house filled you with dread, but now you were there; The healing process had finally begun. Quietly smiling to yourself, you were about to get back to work when a low growl made you halt― It took a moment for you to realize that the sound was actually nothing else but your stomach rumbling. It was no wonder, though: You had barely eaten anything the whole day! If chugging down half a bottle of wine for breakfast didn't count, that is.

"Hey, shouldn't we have a lunch break?" You called for Levi who was finishing cleaning up the upstairs. "Or… it's _a bit_ late for lunch, so more like a dinner or supper break, I guess…" It was already growing dusky outside, meaning you were quite a few hours past the lunch time. You only heard some annoyed grumbles from the upstairs, most probably Levi trying to tell you what he thought about your newest excuse to have a break from working― Even he didn't say anything, you'd guess he had to be starving as well after hours of physical labour. Your mind made up, you headed to kitchen. "Let's see… A couple of tomatoes, a zucchini... onions and potatoes…" You listed what you had left in your pantry. "That's not much, but I think there was some thyme and some other herbs growing in the backyard? A veggie casserole it is, then." You nodded determinedly, then turning your attention to Levi who had joined you. "You'll stay for the dinner, right?" Feeding him was the least you could do to thank him― And to be honest, having someone to keep you company was something you desperately needed at the moment.

"I… well…" Surprised by the invite, Levi took a moment to weigh his options. "No need to bother yourself because of me, I'll just… um…" He scratched the back of his head in a nervous manner, furrowing his brow as he tried to come up with an excuse to turn down the offer.

"What? No, it's no problem―" You looked at him confused. "You can make casserole from pretty much anything, just a little bit of chopping, throw all the stuff into the pan and pan into the oven. No biggie. Hey, wait a second..!" You scowled at him, realizing the true nature of the situation when Levi's expression turned even more sheepish as you kept talking. "You just don't believe I can cook?!"

"What? No!" The look of shock you saw on his face for a fracture of a second told you the truth behind his words. "Why would I think that? Ridiculous. I just… um…" Stumbling with his own words again, Levi gave you another cautious, demure look before turning his gaze away.

"For some reason I never imagined you to be such a poor liar." You blinked slowly as you stared at him in disbelief. "It's kind of intriguing, actually. But enough about that!" Back on the business, you began collecting the ingredients from the pantry as you spoke. "Let's say you have nothing to worry, then; And no reason to refuse, either." You added, giving him a glare over your shoulder before turning your attention back to cooking preparations. "You'll eat and you'll enjoy it, damn it..!" You muttered under your breath as you took out the cutting board and a knife. Hearing Levi quietly scuffle back to upstairs, you began preparing the ingredients― It had been quite a while since you had properly cooked anything by yourself, but before joining the military it had been a daily task for you to help your mother with preparing dinner. Now those days felt so very distant to you, almost like watching the memories of another person. The knife had halted midway of cutting the zucchini when you found yourself staring blankly into the distance, your mind constantly wandering back to that time. "For fuck's sake, just get a hold of yourself..!" You sighed and shook your head, turning your focus back to cooking again. " _I can't even prepare dinner without some damn flashbacks and anxiety attacks? This is getting ridiculous..! I am a living human being, I gotta eat, damn it!"_ Proceeding on chopping the vegetables in an unnecessary furious manner, you tried to get your mind elsewhere.


	12. Ch12 Boiling Point

"What, is it really that unbelievable that I really **can** cook a good meal?"

"I didn't say it was good― But edible, yes."

"Alright, now you're just teasing me!" You tried to answer to his mischievous look with a pout, but couldn't help but to smirk yourself. "Well, at least it was 'edible enough' for you to clean up your plate, huh?" You nodded at the nearly empty plate in front of Levi. "And besides, I could do even better with proper ingredients― I had to get creative with the little I had, you know?" You shrugged lazily. "I even used the mushrooms I found from the backyard; I _think_ they were porcinos..? I'm not sure. Oh well, what are the chances that they're poisonous?"

You had to muster all your strength not to show any reaction when you saw the color quickly fade from the face of your dinner guest― But what crowned it all was that how the last forkful of food halted in mid-air on its way up. Unable to hold it in anymore, you bursted out in a loud laughter. "You should've seen your face!" You giggled almost hysterically. "I was just messing with you; I grew up in the countryside, I can tell poisonous mushrooms from edible ones..!"

"Alright, you got me―" Levi sighed and leaned back in his chair, rubbing his temples as if to tell you how annoyed he was about your jesting. You could tell, though, that he was having a hard time not to show his own amusement. "Just cut it out, will you?" He added when your laughing attack showed no sign of ending.

"Fly agaric casserole… That would be something..!" You chuckled and wiped tears of laughter from the corners of your eyes as you stood up to collect the plates.

"Poison mushrooms or not, thank you for the dinner." Levi smiled shortly. "First and last meal cooked by you I'll ever eat, that's for sure..."

"Aw come on, don't tell me you got mad at me?" You gave him a pout over your shoulder as you headed to kitchen. "I was only joking!"

"Oh, you wanted to make this a habit?" The mischievous tone of his voice made it clear he was only teasing you again, but his words still made your cheeks flush bright red of embarrassment. Luckily for you, you were already hiding out of sight in the kitchen when he said this.

"Make this a habit… Tch!" You repeated his words under your breath and rolled your eyes, trying to cool the heat off by pressing your hands against your flaming cheeks. " _Using every possible moment to tease me, aren't you? Damn Heichou..! But… I wouldn't mind making this a habit, though..."_ Letting out a tiny sigh, you were about to continue loading the dishes into the sink when a movement you saw from the corner of your eye made you jump― You spun around to see Levi at the doorway. "Geez, do you have to sneak around like that? Almost gave me a heart attack..!" You scoffed, turning your attention back on the dirty dishes.

"Just to be clear, I wasn't sneaking around." Levi stated in his usual uninterested tone. "You, instead, were too troubled with your thoughts to notice anything around yourself."

"Thanks for pointing it out…" You mumbled quietly enough for him not to hear, trying to focus on washing the dishes.

"Care to lighten your heart?"

You felt every hair on your body stand up when his voice came from much closer than earlier― Not even daring to peep over your shoulder, you kept your gaze down, but you could tell he was just barely standing out of your immediate presence.

"N-no, not really..!" You finally managed to spit out an answer. "It's nothing."

"Hm." He was quiet for a moment, trying to decide if he was going to be satisfied by your answer or not. "Alright then. It's not like I believe you, but I'm not going to push it."

"Just gimme a break, will you?" Now his attitude was just starting to piss you off. "Do you honestly always have to act like you have **everything** fi-" You turned around to face him, but froze instantly after finding his face only inches away from yours. "-gured out..?" You whimpered the end of a sentence with a shaky voice, unable to break the almost hypnotizing eye contact you two had locked into. You knew Levi had been standing too close to comfort, but you hadn't expected him to be right behind your back! " _...the hell you're staring at..?! Stop it!"_ Were you commanding him or yourself in your mind, you didn't know. Squeezing a wooden ladle in your grip almost painfully hard, you felt a sudden urge to whack him into the face with it― That would be enough to break you out of the situation, for sure..! Luckily for him, Levi took a step back before you were forced to use desperate measures.

"So… Where did you grew up?" Levi broke the awkward silence by changing the topic. "You said you're from the countryside." He said as he stepped next to you and grabbed a kitchen towel, now lazily leaning against the counter to wait for you to finally snap out of it.

"I… yeah." You nodded after returning to the reality, handing the ladle and some other washed dishes to Levi as you continued. "I'm from Deil. It's- I mean… it _was_ a smallish farming village in south of Wall Maria." You paused for a short moment, secretly glancing at Levi before speaking again. "But you most probably already knew that― I don't know why I bother telling you these things… or why you even ask. Well, you're probably just trying to have a conversation, but still." You sighed, handing another clean plate to him. Levi had done thorough background check on you, so he knew pretty much everything about you and your past. " _And I know nothing about him."_ Even after spending all this time with him, you still had no idea who he truly was as a person or what his motives were.

"That is true―" Levi raised his brow slightly as his lips curled up to a little smile. "But that doesn't mean I know everything about you."

" _Oh? But would you like to know?"_ You secretly rolled your eyes. " _That's something he would say if the roles would be reversed… such a tease he is."_

"You got quite a place, I have to admit." Levi scanned the room with his gaze as he spoke. "Getting a residence from the interior isn't an easy task."

"Tell me about it…" You said quietly, trying to focus on finishing washing the dishes― You really didn't like the direction this conversation was going to.

"People often join to the military police to get an easy, safe life behind the inner walls―" He clicked his tongue between the sentences. "Was that your motivator as well?"

"Yes."

"Oh?" Levi sounded a bit surprised by your straight answer. "Well, at least you're honest about it. Looks like you've done pretty well; According to the paperwork, you got this place after merely a year of service."

" _Don't you fucking go there..!"_ You already knew what he was about to say next, and you really didn't want to hear it. Your breathing was growing more and more shallow as you waited for him to continue, making you feel lightheaded as if you were a little tipsy from the wine you had at the dinner. At the moment you really wished it had been the case.

"A rather large residence, isn't it?" His eyes glued onto the back of your neck, Levi weighed his next words carefully. "For one, at least."

"They're **all dead**!" Before you even realized what you were doing, a loud crash of shattering glass exploded in the room as you spun around to face Levi― Small shards of a glassware you had violently bashed to the floor still rained down as you released all the fury inside of you. "There! Now I've said it! You happy now?!" For half a decade you hadn't spoke a word about your family or what had happened to them; Only thinking back to those events made your blood run cold and your chest tighten so bad you could barely breathe. Your insides burning like after a three mile run, you clenched your teeth together as you tried to contain yourself. "You've read the reports, you _knew_ my family died that day..! But you just had to come here and make me say it!"


	13. Ch13 Painful Memories

**FLASHBACK**

"You two! Get the civilians behind the gate― And tell commander to send us some damn backup while you're there!" You shouted orders to your comrades and dashed back into the battle before they could say a thing. Diving down from the Wall Maria, you took an aim on the nape of a huge titan below you, slashing the beast down with a clean cut. The victory was short lived, though; You couldn't even catch your breath when half a dozen titans more barged in through the hole on the wall. " _They just keep pouring in..!"_ You still hadn't fully grasped on the situation: Only a moments ago, a massive titan appeared behind the Wall Maria and breached it, giving the titans an entryway to the city. There was no time ponder why or how this had happened― Your first priority was to prevent any more titans entering the city, but the situation was growing more and more desperate every passing second. Shiganshina district had turned into a warzone, innocent people being slaughtered left and right.

"This is hopeless! We have to fall back!" The leader of your squad, commanding officer Cathrin Holtz, landed next to you. "[l/n]! [l/n], did you hear me?!" She called you again when you showed no sign of obeying the order.

"If we leave, who's going to stop them?!" Swiftly replenishing your blades, you couldn't even take two steps when Cathrin prevented your return to the battle. "If the line of defense breaks, we-" You tried to brush her hand off from your shoulder, but she only tightened her grip.

"There is no line of defense!" She screamed furiously. "Look around yourself! It was already over before it even started―" Roughly spinning you around to face her, Cathrin grabbed onto your collar and pulled you closer so you'd hear her words without a doubt. "We can either die here or live to fight another day, I don't know about you but **I want to live**!" She was right; Even if you'd survive long enough for the backup to arrive, if it ever would, chances of retaking the district would still be nearly nonexistent. "Let's go and try to evacuate as many people as we can." Your squad leader commanded after you reluctantly holstered your blades. "By doing that, maybe we can-" An eruption of bright light from the center of the district made you all stop in your tracks. You had only seen a similar occurrence once before; A second before the colossal titan made its appearance. "N-no way..! No, not again!" Cathrin's face turned ghostly white when she realized what this meant. After recovering from the shock, your squad headed towards the source of light as fast as your 3dmg could take you. By the time you arrived to the scene, the titan was gone, but what you found was even more horrifying.

"The gate has been breached!" One of your squadmates, Wendel, howled in terror when he saw the destruction.

"No..! Not another wall..!" You stuttered in disbelief. Was this the end of humanity? "Over there, there's-"

"We can't stop them all." Cathrin furrowed her brow as she scanned the area. A large group of titans sluggishly made their way towards the breached gate, and it seemed like more than a few had already crossed to the other side. "What the hell we're supposed to do now..?!" Like as an answer to the question, two sets of flares shot up from the eastern part of the city. "Of course..! The waterways!" Cathrin's eyes lit up. "They're evacuating the civilians by boats! Come on, we have to help them!"

"But what if the inner walls have been breached as well? Where would we go?!" Wendel cried out, but followed his leader nevertheless.

"...I don't know." Cathrin said quietly. "We just have to do what we can and hope for the best. Let's go!" The look of determination back in her eyes, she gestured you to follow her. You heard what she had said, but you couldn't make your legs move― Glancing at the broken gate once more, you squeezed the handles of your 3dmg knuckles white as you spoke.

"But… my home village..!" You could only barely hear your own voice over the beating of your heart and the sound of blood rushing through your veins. "My family― They're just outside the-" You couldn't finish your sentence when you felt a painfully hard slap on your cheek. Looking up, you saw Cathrin standing in front of you.

"Snap out of it! You're a soldier!" She shouted on top of her lungs. "Countless lives depend on us― Hundreds and hundreds of families just like yours..! I need you to focus and help us to save the ones we can!"

"But… I…"

"Someone has to fight the beasts while we evacuate people―" Taking a deep breath, Cathrin gave you a meaningful but also a desperate look. "I need you there."

Evacuating the survivals from Shiganshina didn't turn out to be an easy task. Once again, your superior had made a right call by dragging your ass there with her; Where the people were, there also was hungry titans. Thanks to your and your comrades efforts, military police managed to evacuate nearly all of the children before more backup arrived. Even in the midst of battle, you had been keeping a close eye on the Wall Maria― The signal flares rising up from behind it told you the situation was dire, but it also meant there was people putting up a fight against the invading titans. Only when a purple emergency flare was shot somewhere near your home village, you chose to take the matters to your own hands: When the garrison reinforcements arrived, you snatched the first horse available and dashed full speed towards the Deil village.

* * *

 **Back to the present - Levi's POV**

Although he couldn't put his finger on it, Levi had been sure he'd seen her somewhere before. Only now when [f/n] stood in front of him, screaming her lungs out in fury, he could finally see it― Last thing you expect after yanking some pathetic brat out of the mouth of a steaming titan corpse was them to try and swung their broken blade at you, but that was exactly what she did all those years ago. " _Why the fuck you did that?! Why the fuck you had to-?!"_ She had screamed with a hoarse voice, coughing between the words due to both blood and tears she was nearly drowning in as she tried to speak. " _You should've just left me!"_ She had again that same look in her eyes, filled with heartbreaking despair and rage. How he could have forgotten something like that? Still, it was only one of the many haunting encounters Levi had faced on the battlefield, not the first and not the last.

"Do us both a favor and get the hell out of here!" [f/n] growled as she spun around, bashing one last wineglass on the floor on her way out of the kitchen. "Fucking ignorant prick!"

He probably should've said something. Or done something. It was too late for that now, [f/n] had already stormed out of the room and the slam of the door told him she was already out of the house. " _...an ignorant prick? I guess I am."_ Levi thought to himself as he glanced down at the glass shard covered floors. The mystery behind [f/n] was what drove him here; Now he finally knew the reason why there was something so familiar about her, but the strange feeling down in his gut still persisted. He still didn't have the full picture about the events that lead to their meeting during the colossal titan attack, and even though he was curious about it, pursuing the subject didn't sound like a smart idea. An awful one, honestly. " _...How stupid I can be?"_ He had gotten overly confident around [f/n], not thinking his words through― In hindsight, bringing up so boldly a clearly traumatic event of her life was nothing but idiotic.


	14. Ch14 Wounds

"That fucking asshole… Why the heck he had to-?!" You whimpered between the snorts and muffled cries. You sat on the back porch, hugging your knees tightly against your body. It had been ages since you had cried like this; All those suppressed, painful memories and feelings were all pouring out at once. Deep in your heart you had always known that you had to face your past one day, but you didn't want it to happen like this. " _But how, then? Or when?"_ This was something you'd never be ready for, nor one moment would be better than the other. " _This has been one damn exhausting week..!"_ Managing to put on a little smile, you took a deep breath and wiped your tear filled eyes. In all honesty, you felt somehow relieved― It was like a heavy weight had shifted from your chest, letting you finally breathe freely after all these years. " _I guess it was about time… for me to stop running from my past, that is."_ Glancing over your shoulder at the old farmhouse, you couldn't help but to think how far you had come; Your wounds hadn't yet fully healed― and some of them maybe never would― but at least now you had allowed yourself to feel the pain they caused.

You were shaken from your thoughts when the backdoor opened. Levi left the door open behind him so the light from inside dimly illuminated the darkness of the night. Making sure not to even glance to his direction, you kept your gaze down as you waited for him to say something. For a good minute or two, he didn't say a word― As the awkward silence was starting to get on your nerves, you surreptitiously glared up at him; You felt that too familiar gush of warmth on your cheeks when you found out he had been staring at you the whole time he stood there.

"...What the hell you're staring at?" You muttered under your breath as you quickly turned your gaze down again. Confronting the suppressed memories could've been a good thing after all, but that didn't mean you approved his actions; The way he had boldly pursued a clearly sensitive subject had felt almost like a personal attack towards you. You doubt he meant it, but you were hurt nevertheless.

"Are you alright?" He asked with a quiet voice. Even though you had decided not to, you couldn't help but to glance up at him again; He was trying to keep up his calm and collected act, but something in his voice revealed the insecurity he tried to hide behind that mask.

" _Is it just my imagination or does he seem kinda remorseful?"_ You frowned. " _I don't know why it's so surprising… I guess even a guy like him has to take his head out from his ass once in a while..?"_ You opened your mouth to give him a 'well what do you think?' -type of an answer, but couldn't get a single word out when Levi already kneeled next to you, taking your hand in his. Not knowing what to think of this, you just stared at him dumbfounded for a second before you realized what he was doing.

"You're hurt." Carefully rolling your sleeve up, Levi revealed a bleeding wound on your palm― You had been so occupied with your thoughts that you didn't notice it or even felt the pain until now. "Looks like you managed to cut yourself with the glassware. Come on, let's go back inside and get it cleaned."

"Keep applying the pressure on it until the bleeding stops." Levi guided as he sat you on the living room couch. "I'll go get something to patch you up with."

"Levi… Why you're here?" You asked when he returned with the needed supplies. "For reals. You must have some reason… Or did you really came all the way here just to inquire more about my past?" He still hadn't given you an honest explanation― or rather any explanation at all― about his motives. It was a surprise he still stuck around, even after your outburst. " _I think I was quite clear when I told him to fuck off."_ You raised your brow as you examined him, waiting for him to give you an answer. Levi sure took his sweet time, carefully placing the items on the coffee table one by one as if trying to buy time for himself to think.

"I can't deny it wasn't one of the reasons." He finally said, sitting down on the couch next to you.

"Wanna to tell me why?"

"Well…" Pausing for a moment again, Levi gestured you to hold out your hand for him. "I don't know if you remember it, but we've met before, in the past― Briefly, but still." After saying this he fell silent, unsure if to pursue the subject or not.

"In Shiganshina. Yeah, I can remember." You tried your best to put on a brave face, but the melancholy in your voice was more difficult to hide. "Can't forget even if I wanted, to be honest."

"You felt so oddly familiar, but I couldn't recall why." He spoke with a quiet, soft voice, not taking his eyes from the wound as he worked on suppressing the bleed. You, instead, couldn't take your eyes off from him; His coal black hair hung over his face as he carefully examined the injury, ever so gently holding your hand in his as he did this. That stuck up, self-satisfied version of him had stepped aside, letting you once again see that side of him that you adored so much; Under his cocky, even arrogant, shell was a gentle, caring man. "I guess my curiosity got the best of me― And I went a bit too far trying to figure out the truth."

"If that's your way of saying you're sorry, apology accepted." You gave him a slight smile. "But you know, you could've just asked- **Holy hell!** " You yelped, clenching your teeth in pain when Levi poured a splash of alcohol on the wound. "Did you really had to do that..?!"

"Disinfect it? Yes, I really had to." He gave you a mischievous look before turning his attention back on treating the wound. Hair on the back of your neck stood up when Levi reached out to grab a familiar looking wooden case from the table― You had a pretty good idea of what was going to happen next.

"My sewing tools..?! No way-!" You sprung up from the couch, but Levi grabbed onto your shoulder and popped you back onto your seat before you could do a thing. "Just slap a bandage on it! It surely doesn't need-"

"If we bandage it up as it is, I can guarantee the wound is gaping open tomorrow morning." Levi stated calmly, already preparing the needle and a thread. "You're not scared of a few stitches, are you?"

"Have you ever done this before? No, wait, don't answer to that! I don't want to know..!" Whimpering and squealing quietly, you buried your face to your other hand while Levi started the work. Trying to think something else than the needle repeatedly piercing your skin, you focused on keeping up the conversation instead. "So you finally remembered me, huh? I didn't think you would, to be honest." When Levi remained quiet, it looked like you'd need to take care of the talking. "You know… I used to hate you." You felt him stop what he was doing when you said those words, but you still kept your eyes covered, not looking at him as you kept talking― If you really wanted to get everything off from your chest, you had to do it like this; Looking him in the eye while pouring all those memories and feelings out wasn't an option. "I used to hate you for saving my life." Taking a deep breath, you weighed every word carefully. "After the colossal titan attack, my squad was evacuating civilians from Shiganshina. Wall Maria was breached as well- No, just listen; I want to tell you this." You quickly said when you sensed that Levi was about to interrupt you. "Long story short, I chose to disobey given orders and took off to my home village instead. By the time I got there, everyone were already-" You took a moment to prevent your voice from breaking. "They were all gone. Every single one of the villagers… and my family… ripped to pieces and eaten by those fucking monsters, one by one. I can't remember much after that; I think I… snapped? Or something." Letting out a short, tired laugh, you remained quiet for a moment. "I don't know how many titans I managed to kill before running out of gas and blades. Not enough, I bet..! The next thing I can remember is you." You braced yourself and finally glanced up at him; While you had been telling your story, Levi had already finished stitching you up and was now middle of wrapping a layer of bandage around your hand. When he raised his gaze as well, your eyes met for a brief moment before you turned your tear filled gaze back down to your lap. "And this damn house is a symbol of my failure..! I signed the papers the day before the attack. How ironic is that..?" You scoffed, wiping tears from the corners of your eyes as you continued. "I joined to the military police in order to guarantee us a future in the interior― All I worked for was about to become a reality, and then it was all taken away, just like that… because I couldn't save them. If I just had chosen differently― If I had chosen to go there when the wall was breached, if I had been there for them, maybe they would still be alive?"

"You're so torn about it because you made a wrong call?" Levi asked calmly after a moment of silence. "You didn't. When you're out there, on a battlefield, there are no 'right' or 'wrong' decisions… so all you can do is pick the one you'll regret the least. Yes, you couldn't save them― As harsh as it sounds, sometimes… no matter what you do, no matter how hard you fight... sometimes people die. Believe me, I know."

"But I… If I'd just-" Your heart skipped a beat when you felt his hand lightly brush against your chin― Gently wiping off the single tear that had rolled down your cheek, Levi gave you a meaningful look before speaking again.

"There's always a million 'if's. Every time. I've saved a hundred people while thousand died― How I cope with it?" Pausing for a second, he stood up to collect the first aid tools from the table. "By believing that those hundred lives make it count."

"Make it count..?" You repeated his words under your breath when Levi went to take the supplies back to their places. For a moment, you sat there alone, puzzled by his words.


	15. Ch15 Back to Work

"Ugh… What time it is?" Sluggishly raising your head from the pillow, you had to muster all your strength to get your eyes open. Bright rays of sunlight pouring into the room through the thin curtains hinted you had slept until noon. It wasn't a wonder, taking into account that you had stayed up almost the whole night, telling Levi about yourself and your past. "Oh, right… I probably should've changed before going to bed..!" You muttered when you realized you had crashed to bed still fully dressed― You had been already half asleep when dragging yourself into your bedroom, not even thinking about your blood and sweat stained clothes when going to sleep. You hopped out of the bed and tiptoed to the hallway, taking a peek into the guest bedroom on your way downstairs; "...Levi?" You called for his name when you only found an empty, neatly made bed. It was already past midday, so it wouldn't be a surprise if he had already left. When there was no answer, you assumed this to be the case and you made your way to downstairs.

When you persuaded Levi to stay for the night, you had exploit the fact how pointless it would be for him to go back to HQ at that hour― Truth to be told, the thought of spending the night alone in that house made your anxiety levels rise uncomfortably high. He most probably saw right through you and stayed purely out of pity, but as long as you didn't have to be alone, you didn't complain. It felt kind of weird to wake up without even a slightest hangover; This was the first night you spent in that house without drinking yourself to sleep. " _And not the last, I hope..! Things are starting to look up~!"_ Quietly smiling to yourself, you hopped the few very last steps of the staircase down and pranced across the living room, towards the kitchen about to grab some breakfast, but stopped by your tracks when you noticed something on the coffee table. "Huh? A note… and what's this?" Next to the folded piece of paper was a small parcel. Taking a closer look, you saw that the mystery item was wrapped into a something that looked like a handkerchief and tied up with a single piece of thread. Did he left you a gift of some sort? "Whaaat..? Is this..?" What was unwrapped from the package was… "...an acorn?" Or at least it looked like one, but not an ordinary individual, to say at least. "This thing is huge! Size of a child's fist..!" After recovering from the bafflement, you couldn't help but to giggle at the sight of a chubby acorn. " _It's so cute..! Where the heck did he got this? I've never seen anything like it..!"_ The note he left probably had some answers, so you snatched the piece of paper from the table and folded it open. "Almost forgot; an acorn of a giant oak, picked up during our latest expedition. Newly found species, or at least so four-eyes claimed. Wouldn't take her word for it..." You read the message out loud. " _He really brought me something from outside the walls?! I was only joking when I suggested it, I didn't think he'd do it for reals!"_ Surprised but also delighted by the gesture, you simply couldn't stop smiling for the rest of the day, nor stop playing with your tiny gift.

The next few days went rather uneventfully― The talk you had with Levi gave you a lot of good reasons for some introspection and self-reflection, and that was exactly what you tried to focus on for now. Living in a house which was once supposed to become your family home got easier as time passed, but it would still take a while before you'd truly feel at home there.

" _I guess I could do something to the garden..?"_ Raising your gaze from the book in your hands, you casted your eye over the weed filled backyard. After a 6 year long streak of working round-the-clock, slacking off at home and doing nothing was difficult to get used to. Even now you were just chilling on the back porch, reading a book. " _I kind of like it lush, but the front yard is almost like a jungle…"_ Fighting an urge to yawn, you placed the book down next to you as your eyelids started to feel heavier; It was barely a lunch time and you were already snoozing off. " _Who knew that being unemployed would be so… boring? I need to figure out at least a somewhat smart way to kill time or I'll catch a cabin fever in no time…"_ Little you knew that the answer to your problem was about to come knocking at any moment― Very much literally. Only after 10 minutes or so, your slumber was ceased; You raised your head and listened carefully when you thought you heard some noise coming from the other side of the house. And sure enough, soon you heard a voice calling for you.

"Hello? Is anybody home?"

"What the..? Who..?" You furrowed your brow when you heard an unfamiliar voice echo from the front yard. Rubbing the sleepy dust from your eyes, you scuffed up, then proceed on making your way around the house. The person standing at your doorstep didn't look familiar to you― But what caught your eye was the attire this light haired man was wearing. You could tell by the very first glance that your visitor was from the military, but it was the regiment that surprised you: The wing insignia on the back of the jacket told you he was from nowhere else but the scout regiment.

"Ah! [f/n] [l/n], I presume?" The man greeted you when he saw you walking up to him. "Are you ready to go?"

"Uh… That's me, yes, but…" You looked at him baffled, having no idea what he was talking about. "Ready to go? Where?"

"Where?" He blinked confused as if the answer was clear. "To work, of course!"

* * *

"My apologies― Captain gave me an impression that he had already briefed you."

"He sure didn't..!" You muttered under your breath as you followed the scout regiment soldier, who had introduced himself as Moblit Berner, through the hallways of the base. Levi had apparently arranged you a job of some sort― Without telling you about it. " _And I doubt that he forgot to..! A letter would've been enough, but instead he just sends someone to pick me up?!"_ You sighed to yourself, then turning your attention back to Moblit. "So tell me, what kind of job this exactly is?"

"He really didn't tell you anything?" Moblit glanced at you over his shoulder, looking equally surprised and amused about your cluelessness. "Well… It's nothing too complicated, so no need to worry about that. From what I've heard, you're very much overqualified to a job like this, but…" He paused for a second as you two stopped at the door in end of the hallway. "We're short on staff at the moment, so just as long as someone gets the job done, we're not going to complain."

"Research laboratory?" You read the sign on the door. "I sure hope you're not looking for guinea pigs for your experiments..!"

"No, thankfully we aren't." Moblit gave you a short smile as he looked for a right key from the keyring. When he found the right one, he unlocked the door before handing the key to you. "You'll need this― Ever since we caught the living test subjects, section commander and I have spend most of our time in the research room in the courtyard. The titan research is in full swing…" He stated as he swung the door open. "Which also means that we're falling behind on keeping up the archive."

"I… can see that." Your jaw almost dropped to the floor when you saw the sight behind the door. Honestly, the room looked like a bomb had gone off in there; Loose papers and documents covered the floors and desks, and every bookcase was stuffed so full of books and notes they looked like they were going to burst at any moment. Spiderwebs on the corners of the ceiling told you the room hadn't been cleaned in ages.

"Yup, so…" Moblit scratched the back of his head seemingly embarrassed. "The information stored in this room is invaluable― And unusable like this. It can take half a day for me to find a document I'm looking for..!" He sighed and shook his head, gesturing you to follow him in. "Your job is to get everything in order and archived in here. I hope you're not in a hurry; This may take a while."


	16. Ch16 Love Letter

"April 844..? OK. And these are from... January 846? Where the heck did I put the ones from 845?!" Reaching over to your left, you snatched a bunch of papers from the floor― And accidentally pushed over a tower of piled research reports while doing so. "Uagh! Are you kidding me..? I just went through all of those..!" You whimpered, hastily collecting the documents back into the pile. This was already your third day on the job, but it felt like you hadn't done much any progress. It had been difficult enough just to figure out where to start― There was such a tremendous amounts of work to be done, especially if you were to do this all by yourself. "Moblit wasn't kidding when he said this will take a while..!" You muttered under your breath as you stood up. Carefully picking up one of the piles, you waddled across the room and over to the only desk which wasn't covered in loose papers and other random stuff. After a few hours of sorting the reports by a date and category, you decided it was time for a well deserved break. You put the papers down and stretched a bit, scanning the messy room with your sight.

" _I wonder how Levi is doing..?"_ You caught yourself thinking about him― again. Even though you didn't want to admit it, you simply couldn't get the survey corps captain out of your mind. " _I kind of wished he'd come by at some point…"_ You sighed to yourself, instinctively glancing over at the door. Captain Levi was a busy man, so you shouldn't be surprised that he didn't clear his schedule just to see you. " _What I even was hoping for, exactly?"_ Letting out a tiny sigh, you rested your head against the table surface. " _It would've been nice to get to thank him for what he did for me… But what I'm supposed to do? Wander aimlessly around the base until I bump into him?"_ You sighed again and sluggishly raised your head. An blank piece of paper on the desk in front of you gave you an idea; You still hadn't thought of how you'd deliver the message, but you grabbed a quill and began writing nevertheless. Or at least you tried to― you couldn't even write two words before you halted to think. " _Dear Levi… or is that too… uhm… intimate..? Or am I just being silly, overthinking so much? Oh for fuck's sake..."_ Already feeling the warmth lingering on your cheeks, you crumpled the paper in your hands and tossed it away, then snatched a new one and started over. " _ **Captain**_ _Levi. Can't go wrong with that one..!"_ Okay, that was a start. You bit your lower lip and tried to get something on the paper― It proved out to be more difficult than expected, but in the end you managed to put together a letter you were at least somewhat satisfied with. " _Okay, then... How the heck I'm going to deliver this?"_ You fiddled with the envelope nervously after sealing it. " _Going to his office and giving it personally is maybe a bit too much for me… Maybe I'll just slip it under the door, or…"_ Your brainwork was interrupted when you heard loud chatter coming from the hallway. Hastily stuffing the envelope into your pocket, you stood up and made your way across the room and to the door to see what the commotion was about… but you couldn't even grab the doorknob when the door already flew open, slamming straight into your face― The impact was enough to throw you to the floor, but thankfully a pile of papers behind you broke your fall.

"...but why all the fuss about it? Geez, it's not _that_ dangerous!" Brunette woman continued her rambling as she marched into the room, not seeming to even notice you until Moblit rushed for your aid. "Oh?" She blinked surprised. "What are you doing down there?"

* * *

"I'm fine, really..! I was just startled, that's all." You gave the duo a nervous smile across the table before taking a small sip of your tea. "It was my fault, too." The one who accidentally slammed the door into your face was no-one else but section commander Hange herself; You two were never properly acquainted, but you had briefly met her a few times in the past, even worked directly under her during the battle of Trost.

"You should be more careful, section commander!" Moblit let out a deep sigh. "If you barge into a room like that, you-"

"Who are you, anyways?"

"She's the one who I hired to help us with managing the archive..! I'm certain I-"

"Oh right, right..! Hey, you look kind of familiar― Have we met before?"

"...I'll leave you to it…" Having enough of his superior constantly ignoring him, Moblit stood up and shuffled towards the backroom with his cup of tea. Hange didn't acknowledge this in any way, keeping her gaze fixated on you as she waited for you to say something.

"Um… yeah, we worked together in Trost. I was in military police at the time." You clarified when your answer didn't seem to ring any bells. "Commanding officer [l/n], second squad of the western-"

"Ah! Yes, now I remember!" Hange swatted her hand onto her forehead when it finally occurred to her. "Yes, of course! [l/n]..! You made quite an impression that day― Fought like a true, hard-boiled elite!" She exclaimed, eyes sparkling in excitement and a wide grin on her face. "That was quite something..!"

"It wasn't **that** extraordinary, I can assure you..!" Listening her go on about your achievements in the past battles made you feel a bit awkward; Trost was your career breakthrough, yes, but you wouldn't exactly call yourself an elite only based on that. "I only did my duty as a soldier, nothing more."

"Aw come on, don't be so modest." She smirked, pouring both of you another cup of tea before you could even finish the first one. "Soldiers like you are the backbone of the military. MPs are sure glad to have you~!" Hange was again babbling in such a speed that you couldn't even say a word. "Are you still a commanding officer or did you make it up to a warrant officer already? Honestly, I'm kinda surprised to find someone like you in here, I'd imagine you'd be too busy for stuff like this― Moblit could've just put a cadet on this job, or…"

"Uh… well, about that…" You were finally able to get a word when Hange had to stop to take a breath. "I'm not busy, not at all― I resigned a bit less than two weeks ago… due to personal reasons." You added.

"Whaaat?" Hange gasped, eyes wide in surprise. For a second she looked so baffled that she couldn't get a word out of her mouth. "Oh..! Okay..! That explains it…" She nodded slowly, furrowing her brow as she continued. "So what you're going to do now?"

"I… don't really know. Get this place in order, for starters?" You gave her a nervous smile, slowly bringing your teacup back to your lips― Your answer didn't satisfy the section commander, though.

"You know what..?" The gleam in her eyes was somewhat unnerving as she leaned closer, the grin only widening on her face. "I think I got you a better deal; Have you ever thought about joining the scout regiment?"


	17. Ch17 Decisions

" _Am I totally sure about this..? This is crazy!"_ You stood alone in the research lab, staring blankly out the window. Section commander Hange held you an hour long speech about the reasons why you should join the scout regiment before letting you go yesterday― And you bet she would've kept talking if you hadn't given her an answer. " _Why the heck I went and said yes?! These are the type of decisions you should put your thought into, not just blurt out the first answer that comes to your mind..!"_ It was too late to regret now; Hange was at the very moment in Commander Erwin's office, finishing up your recruiting process. "But the more I think about it… maybe it's not such a crazy idea after all?" You muttered under your breath. Hange had made a few very good points, you had to admit: You were an able soldier, someone who had seen more than a few dire battles. Scout regiment desperately needed people like you in their rows, and seriously, what else you'd do for the rest of your life if not this? Become a farmer? Or a baker? Or maybe a shoemaker? Only the thought made you sneer. " _If I want to do something that matters, this is it."_ This was the right thing to do and now you were sure about it. One thing kept nagging you, though: " _I don't know why, but I have a feeling that Levi isn't going to be too happy about this..!"_ You had expressed your concern to Hange, but she didn't think too much about it. " _Captain Shorty? What he has to do with anything?"_ You repeated her words in your mind. " _She had a point when she said that Levi just should be glad if I join: Scout regiment gets a one soldier more… and I'll have a new purpose in life."_ So, what was the problem? The idea of you joining survey corps wasn't far fetched, not at all… So it must've crossed Levi's mind too, but he chose not to bring it up― Of course, this alone didn't mean he would surely opposite this, but he still had his own reasons not to even mention the possibility. " _OK, you're overthinking again!"_ Shaking the worrisome thoughts from your head, you were about to go back to filing the reports when Hange returned.

"It's official~!" She chanted as she pranced over to you. "Erwin sends you his regards; He asked you to pop in his office when you have time so he can greet our newest recruit personally." Hange added with a wink.

"Oh..! Alright, then. I'll do that." You gave her a demure smile and nodded, trying your best to put on a brave face. This was really it, then? You were now officially a soldier of the scout regiment, Levi wanted it or not. "I guess there's no going back now, huh?" You smirked. "So, what happens next?"

"Ah, yes! There's one thing more I'd like discuss with you― It's more like a proposition, actually, but I'd prefer us to have that conversation in the titan research room." Hange rubbed her hands together as she spoke, seemingly excited about this proposition of hers― whatever it was. "But first things first: You should go and grab your uniform from the logistics office. When you're done, I'll see you in the research room, OK?"

* * *

Since you only needed a jacket and a cape, your visit to the logistics office was a brief one. You made your way across the courtyard and towards the titan research room, curious to hear what it was Hange wanted to talk about. You were just about to enter the room when a familiar voice you heard from the inside made you halt: It sounded like someone was middle of a heated conversation with Hange. You could tell who it was, but you didn't want to believe it before seeing it with your own eyes― Cautiously and trying not to be seen, you took a small peek inside; It was him.

"Aw come on, Levi!" Hange groaned in frustration. "What's with the attitude? Seriously! Since when I'm supposed to consult you before recruiting people to my team, huh?"

"To _your_ team?" Levi growled. He was standing his back turned at you, so you couldn't see his face, but the tone of his voice and the way he clenched his fists told you enough about his current mindset. "From all the teams, it has to be **yours**? Isn't that fucking perfect..!"

"Hey!" Hange shot an annoyed glare at Levi. "What, are you jealous that for once **I** managed to snatch an elite like her to my team? Learn to share, shorty..."

"Congratu-fucking-lations, you got yourself a loose cannon!" Levi snapped, shoving a bunch of papers to Hange. "Take a closer look! What she pulled off in Trost... only people who don't care if they make it out alive or not can do something like that! Even an idiot like you should've seen it!"

You stood there paralyzed, listening every word in disbelief. What Levi was referring to had to be your report from Trost; He must've gotten his hands on it when he looked you up. There was a hint of truth in his words, but hearing him say all those things made your stomach turn. You found yourself instinctively squeezing a piece of paper you had in your pocket― the letter you had written for him. You had forgotten all about it when Hange brought up the idea of you joining the scout regiment... and maybe it was for the best that you did, after all.

"You can't know that for sure." Hange frowned, only taking a quick glance at the documents before turning her attention back to Levi. "And even if it had been the case, she-"

"It's only pure luck she's still even alive!" At this point he was almost shouting. "If she goes and gets herself killed, it's on you! That brat won't survive back from her first expedition, I can guarantee that!"

"If you're trying to make me change my mind, it's not happening; I've decided to offer [f/n] a position as my research assistant." Hange stated, crossing her arms over her chest in a defensive manner. "Geez, why you're getting so worked up because of this? What's the deal with the two of you, anyways?"

"Don't give me that look― There's nothing between us, if that's what you're implying." Levi snarled. "So mind your own business, will you?" Getting enough of this conversation, he gave Hange a one last glare before turning away to leave. "I just don't like people go dying for nothing."

"Yeah, **I** should mind my own business..!" Hange scoffed. "Only if you'd do the same..!"

"What a fucking mess…" Levi cursed under his breath on his way out. He was still fuming, but the look in his eyes changed at instant when his gaze met yours in the doorway― For a few seconds, you two just stared at each other, neither one of you saying a word. The expression on his face was a mixture of both shock and disbelief; The fact that you had been present during his outburst was something he clearly didn't expect. Before he could bring himself to say something, you boldly walked straight past him, not even glancing to his direction anymore when doing so.

"It's fine." Was the only thing you said to him. You weren't fine, though― But this wasn't the place or time to pursue the matter. Doing what you did best, suppressing all the negative emotions inside you, you walked up to Hange, giving her a slight smile as you spoke. "Research assistant, you said? That sounds good."


	18. Ch18 Keep Your Cool

"I don't know why you were so worried about her, shorty― She frickin' almost decapitated that thing..! If we encounter any more titans on the way to the new outpost, I'll gladly let her take care of-"

"Tch… Just do your job like the rest of us."

You listened the exchange of words with half an ear as you waited for the rest of the bunch get off from their horses. Only after merely two weeks of service in the survey corps, a time had finally come for your very first official expedition trip. Even though it had already been years since humanity was forced to abandon Wall Maria, survey corps still tirelessly scouted the area, making a multiple expedition trips a year into the former human territory in order to recover some of the most valuable lost resources and supplies. And, of course, slowly but surely gain more and more foothold within the territory by setting up a line of outposts, so maybe one day humanity could reclaim what once was theirs. This was what your first mission was also about. Ride to the first outpost was fairly smooth, apart from a few titans that wandered into your way― Nothing that you couldn't handle, though. Now thinking back to it, you maybe overdid it a bit; You butchered the beasts in a record time, before anyone else could barely do a thing.

"What you did on the way here… that was awesome!" Eren declared as he jogged over to you, a look of respect and admiration sparkling in his teal-green eyes. "You must be almost as insanely strong as Captain Levi!"

"Oh no, no… I highly doubt that, but thanks anyways. I've done my fair share of killing those creatures in the past, so I know how it's done." You gave him a demure smile. "But, in all fairness I have to say that my performance wasn't exactly flawless."

"Huh?" He blinked confused. "How so?"

"I got carried away― Staying in control and level-headed is one of the first rules of how to survive in the battlefield." You let out a small sigh and rubbed the back of your head. Letting the burning need to prove yourself to Levi cloud your judgement wasn't definitely a good thing― If you wouldn't be able to keep your head cool, you'd soon end up dead just like he had predicted. "Anger can be a good thing, its burn gives you strength to fight… But if you let it control you? Not so much."

"I see…" Eren nodded, a pondering look painted on his face. "I tend to have the same problem, so I totally get it… I just don't know how to deal with it."

You and Eren continued your conversation for a few more minutes, he telling you about his problems on containing himself― in a both human and titan form. You did your best to give him an advice, and he seemed to take your words to the heart. Since you had gotten used to being a lone wolf in the military police, you hadn't really tried hard to make friends in the scout regiment either― But since you often worked closely with Eren, you had quickly gotten to know him and his friends, they now treating you like one of their own. Overall, it took you no time to gain a pretty good foothold for yourself in the survey corps; Your military background was more than enough to convince most of your superiors… everyone else but Captain Levi, that is. You could say that he was still adjusting to the situation; Even though he didn't try to get you sacked, he wasn't clearly too happy about you joining either.

" _Whatever…"_ You secretly scowled at the raven haired man while Hange was talking to Eren about his titan transforming ability. " _It could be the best for me to try and keep my distance, for now at least."_ Confronting Levi after his outburst was something you were everything but excited about. You had tried to keep up a low profile, not exchanging more than a few casual words with him after that. In other words, things weren't too great between you two: Levi was mad at you and you were still hurt because of his words. " _Maybe as the time goes by… maybe things settle down and we can forget the whole thing."_ When you instinctively glanced at him again, he happened to look to your direction as well― Turning your gaze away almost immediately when your eyes met, you couldn't help but to feel that too familiar feeling of warmth on your cheeks. " _Why am I this angry at him, anyways..?"_ You pouted to yourself. " _I've been so focused on thinking that he doesn't have faith in me, ignoring the fact that he could've just been worried― and truthfully, since my history is what it is, I can't really blame him."_ Even though you didn't want to admit it to yourself, the reason why you were so miffed at Levi had nothing to do with that if he had faith in your skills or not; It was something else he said during his outburst that made your tiny heart fall down to the bottom of your stomach. " _It was my fault anyways… to get my hopes up, that is."_ As foolish as it was, you had let your guard down and allowed your feelings towards him develop into something more than just a friendship. " _There's nothing between us."_ Only even repeating his words in your mind made your stomach sting. " _I was stupid to even think he could feel the same..! Argh, just forget it, it was nothing but a silly crush!"_

"Hey."

You snapped out of your gloomy thoughts just to see no-one else but Captain Levi slowly pacing towards you. Taking a second to calm your nerves, you took a deep breath before finally replying.

"Hi. What is it?" You tried your best to sound calm and collected, giving an impression that everything was fine between you two... But you weren't sure if your performance was convincing enough.

"Uh… nothing, really." Levi looked a bit surprised by your 'straight-to-the-point' -type of an approach. For maybe a minute― which felt like an eternity― you two just stood there in an awkward silence. "How's your hand?" He finally asked, eyes nailed on the tiny pebble he kept lazily kicking around as he waited for you to say something.

"This?" You glanced down at your bandage covered hand. "Fine, I guess. It's healing pretty fast, so I took the stitches off few days ago." You shrugged, secretly pouting to yourself as you continued. "And no, it doesn't affect to my performance, if that's what you're implying."

"What? No, that's not why I asked..!" He flustered, taken by a surprise by the accusation. Furrowing his brow as he lowered his gaze, Levi took a moment to ponder what to say next― After seeing him act so uneasy, you couldn't help but to feel bad about snapping at him like that. "It's just that... I wanted to-" Levi glanced at you in a somewhat cautious manner as he spoke, but he couldn't say more than a few words before an announcement to proceed interrupted him.

"OK, guys..!" Hange clapped her hands when a signal flare rose up to the sky, telling every group closeby it was time to go. "Let's do this!" She chuckled, seemingly excited for the upcoming journey. "Oh, and hey [f/n], you're going with-"

"Connie and the others, yeah." You finished Hange's sentence, giving her a confident nod. When leaving the first outpost, all groups were to divide into the long distance scouting formation and proceed to the final destination; an abandoned military police base in the southwest region of the Wall Maria. The plan was to swipe out any titans within a two mile radius from the base, surround the place and then finish off the beasts within the base grounds by performing a nice, tidy flanking maneuver from every compass point. After the base was secured, you'd have a new outpost up and running in no time. Easier said than done, though; according to the scouts, the whole damn area was basically crawling with titans. Even though you were officially part of Hange's team, for the sake of balancing the squads you were addressed to go with some less experienced cadets. Already eager to get going, you were just about to mount your horse when Levi halted you.

"You did well on the way here, so… keep up the good work." He said, hesitating for a second before giving the most awkward pat ever onto your back. "And good luck."

"Oh..?" You blinked confused― Hearing supportive words from him was the last thing you expected! Unable not to smile at the gesture, you smirked as you mounted your horse. "Thanks. I would tell you the same, but as you know…"

"The humanity's strongest soldier can manage without a kiss for good luck. Yeah, I remember." Levi raised his brow, giving you a mischievous look accompanied by a slight smile.

"Yep." You grinned again. "See you at the base, then― And when we get that new outpost up and running, you owe me a cup of tea, OK? Yeah, I know you have a stash on you, even on the expeditions." You answered to his surprised look. "Everyone knows you do." Giving him one last smirk, you turned your horse around and dashed after your squad.

* * *

The journey across a prairie proved far more challenging than the ride to the first outpost; Your squad encountered multiple titans, but miraculously managed to take every single one of the beasts down without any casualties. The darkening clouds looming above you hinted that the weather was going to give you trouble as well― When you eventually arrived to your destination, the downpour finally began.

"Argh, isn't this just great?" Connie whimpered, tugging the hood of his cape up to cover his head from the rain as your squad made their way to the meeting spot outside the base wall. "As if this mission wasn't difficult enough without shitty weather..! And where the heck is the other squad? Don't tell me we're going to attack without the backup if they don't show up!"

"Yes, we are." You muttered under your breath. "And your attitude is really helping, by the way― Really lifts up the spirits, you know?" You gave your whiny squadmate a stoic look as you got off from your horse. "But I can't say that the weather doesn't complicate things… Only even seeing the signal flare in this storm can be difficult." You mumbled and scanned the darkened skies with your gaze― The signal to attack could come at any moment, and unfortunately it started to look like that your backup squad didn't made it. Were they only delayed or dead, you had no idea, but you'd have to go on with the mission nevertheless. "So keep your eyes peeled and be ready. I'm going up there..." You nodded at the base wall. "...and scout the area so we'll know what's ahead."


	19. Ch19 Take 'em Down

**Levi's POV**

"Still no signal from the northern squad, Captain."

"Yes, I am very much aware of that." Levi stated dryly, not taking his eyes from the direction of the northern corner of the base. After sweeping the area, every squad had shot up a yellow signal flare as a signal of a successful mission... all except one; [f/n]'s squad. But thanks to the awful weather conditions and the fact that her squad was the one located farthest from the central of the base, even if the flare was shot, there was a good chance that no-one could see it. But, unfortunately, that also applied to the emergency flares.

"Sir, we should send a team to investigate the situation." Petra added in a more demanding tone when Levi just kept quietly staring into the distance. "I'll send the first returning squad-"

"Oluo. Petra." Levi interrupted. "You'll stay here and inform Erwin and the squad leaders about the situation. Rest of you with me." He gave Eld and Gunther a meaningful look before unsheathing his blades.

"C-captain?!" Petra stuttered, unable to believe her ears. "But you just can't-"

"Look!" Gunther suddenly exclaimed, pointing at the figure in the distance. "Someone is coming!"

"Springer?" Levi furrowed his brow when he recognized the person who almost outright crashed in front of him from the air. "What the hell happened? Where's the rest of your squad?"

"I… We…" Connie gasped between wheezing breathes and gasps of air as he tried to calm down, clutching his hand against his chest as if his racing heart was about to burst at any second. "Two abnormals… we tried to signal for help…" He panted. "The other squad never came and we lost two of our men already..!"

* * *

 **Reader's POV**

"Oh my **FUCKING GOD** , just die already!" You screamed furiously after dodging one and then another swoop of a giant hand. Peeking over to the other side of the base wall had almost costed you your head― very much literally, unfortunately. It was almost like the bastards had been waiting for you; You had managed to leap away barely in time when one of the titans outright launched at you from behind the wall. You had finally managed to take down the other one of the abnormals, but the second one was giving you a lot more trouble than the first one. " _That bastard is a fast one..!"_ You'd think that the huge, caricature of a head that wildly swayed from side to side on the titan's bony shoulders would slow it down even a bit or at least reduce its field of vision, but no; this bastard was almost like possessed, launching straight back at you after every failed attempt to gobble you up. If one of your squadmates hadn't kept the beast distracted― and given her life as doing so― while you killed the first abnormal, you doubt you could have taken down either one of the titans. Fighting both of them at the same time would've been a suicide! "Connie… please, hurry..!" That jockey was your only hope at the moment. Thanks to the heavy rain, the emergency flares were good as nothing, so your best bet was to send someone to get help. "I swear, if I'll die while fighting these motherfuckers..! I'll swear I'll come back and haunt you for all the eternity- Yikes!" This time when you had time to react, the stubby fingers were already basically wrapping around you, forcing you to release the grappling hooks and let yourself fall down, just barely in time to avoid the titan's crushing grip. The adrenaline pumping in your veins and just the pure will to live keeping you moving, you hadn't realized how exhausted you were until you hit the ground; Taking the impact gracefully like a llama in roller skates, you fell onto your knees when you landed, but managed to scuffle back onto your feet almost right away. Tilting your head backwards only to see the massive creature towering right above you, you didn't have to think twice before bolting away from its reach― But instead of running into the opposite direction, you skittered between the pudgy legs of the titan, praying in your mind it wouldn't be able to reach you. Then, the worst possible scenario happened: Stumbling into your own feet, you crashed down painfully onto your stomach, sending tiny pebbles flying into every direction.

"Oh no..! Oh no!" You were already screaming and cursing in panic when you tripped, but when you felt the stubby fingers brush against your feet you started outright screeching and howling like a maniac, desperately trying to kick the giant hand away before it would get a hold of your ankle. Flopping onto your side, you shot a grappling hook into the wall of one of the ruined houses― It was going to be a bumpy, painful ride, but you didn't have much of a choice at the moment. You hit the switch and reeled yourself across the yard, out of the titan's reach. Like said, getting dragged on the ground for a good 50 feet wasn't exactly a pleasant experience― especially when the rain had filled the yard with mud puddles― and all the bumps and bruises on your body would act as a proof of that. You couldn't even get back up and onto your feet when you heard a loud thud from behind you; Turning to look at the titan, you found it laying on the ground, twisting and turning like a fish out of water. "What the hell..?" You panted out of breath and swiped the messy hair away from your face as you examined the situation in disbelief, not even bothering to scuffle up onto your feet after seeing the titan was down. When you had skittered between its legs, the titan had leaned forwards while trying to reach out for you, and that's when the good old law of physics took that bobblehead of a titan down. "Just look at that..!" You let out a weary laugh as the feeling of both exhaustion and relief flushed over you; The fight was finally over.

"Oi! What the hell happened in here?!"

Glancing over your shoulder, you saw a group of people approaching; the very much needed backup, just a little bit too late. What took you surprise, though, was the fact that Levi was one of the approaching figures.

"Oh, you guys finally came―" You tried to give Levi and the others an unimpressed, a bit taunting look, but couldn't prevent the slight smile spreading onto your face as you continued. "But looks like you missed the party."

"Holy heck, [f/n]..!" Connie's jaw dropped as he scanned the now so quiet battleground. "You did it..!"

"Just don't go near that one, it's still alive." You nodded at the fallen titan, giving them a tiresome grin as you continued. "It just… let's just say that the situation kinda handled itself."

"If that's the case, consider yourself lucky." Levi, who had been examining the situation just as baffled as the others, finally turned his attention back to you. "That type of stuff won't happen out here too often." He added with a slight smile and offered his hand to help you up from the ground.

"Not that I'm saying there was nothing to do with the skill~!" Taking his hand, you struggled up onto your still wobbly feet. "Gotta take some credit-"

"Uhh..! Guys?!"

"Huh?" Snapping out of it, you and Levi both turned to see what Connie was so shocked about. "Are you kidding me..?!" Your jaw dropped when you realized that the bobblehead titan was trying to get up― and the most shocking part was that against all the laws of physics, it was nearly succeeding. "Ugh..! No way..! Can't you just stay down, you little piece of-"

You were unable to finish your verbal threat when the titan already crashed back down to the ground― But unluckily for all the people around it, it managed to crash straight into a crumbling remains of a watchtower. All you could do was scream when the tall stone construction began to crumble, dangerously tilting into your direction as it came down. You had barely even time to react when Levi already had grabbed onto you, hauling your sorryass to the safety with him before you got crushed by rubble. The tower came down with a loud crash, but everyone managed to get out of the way in time. Still dizzy and stumped, you scuffled up into a half sitting position to examine the chaos. The situation didn't look half as bad as you had expected, but it was when you turned to look at Levi when your heart dropped. He was a couple feet away from you, still down on all fours on the ground, hanging his head down seemingly in pain. His posture and the way he squeezed his hand against his head made it difficult for you to see what had happened, but droplets of blood on the ground told you enough.

* * *

 **Few hours later -**

"I'm fine."

"Oh is that so? You don't look like it."

"It's nothing. You should worry about yourself."

"...Don't tell me you just told me to mind my own business?"

Levi had to be the most stubborn man you had ever met― No matter what you said, he absolutely refused to get his injuries treated. Instead, right after the camp was set up, he had retreated into his tent to lick his wounds. You couldn't help but to feel it was your fault that he got hurt, so you did your best to help him… or at least tried to.

"I got only some mere bumps and scratches― I think it's you who should pay a visit to the medic tent." You gave Levi an unimpressed but a meaningful look. Thankfully he got hit by a piece of broken wood instead of a chunk of stone rubble, but the injury looked pretty bad either way; when he momentarily shifted the bloody rag from his temple, you saw a lilac bruise accompanied by a quite nasty looking, bleeding wound. Levi just scoffed and mumbled something under his breath, clearly having no intention to do as suggested. "Ok, fine." You sighed. "Don't go to the medics, but at least let me take a look, then..!"

"I told you I'm fine." He muttered, turning his gaze away like a stubborn little kid avoiding his mother's glare.

"Yeah, sure you are." You rolled your eyes as you marched across the tent, flopping next to him onto the edge of his bunk before he could say or do a thing. "Come on, let me take a look― No need to be scared, I'm not going to bite." You added in a teasing manner when Levi showed no signs of obeying. This seemed to finally do the trick; Letting out a deep sigh, Levi lowered his hand, exposing the wound so you could take a look. Now when you had the opportunity to do what you intended, you couldn't help but to suddenly feel a bit awkward. " _Typical me, always acting before thinking..!"_ You secretly bit your lower lip as you carefully brushed his hair out of the way so you could see better. Momentarily you had been able to forget the messy bundle of mixed feelings you secretly held for this man, but being close to him like this made it all come back to you at instant. Trying to shook it all off, you focused on treating his injuries. "Hmm… Okay, the good news is that I don't think you'll need any stitches…" You said after taking a moment to examine the wound. "But we should get this properly cleaned and… well, slap a bandage on it."

"I think I can manage without a bandage." Levi smiled shortly as he said this. Finally, after succumbing to his fate he seemed to relax a bit, dropping the stubborn kid -act. While mending the wound, you couldn't prevent your gaze from wandering; at first, you were just making sure you weren't hurting him as you cleaned the wound, but then you found yourself occasionally staring at him. Levi was typically difficult to read, but right now you had absolutely no idea what was on his mind. Even though he wasn't acting up anymore, the silence had fell into the room, you both being too wrapped up in your thoughts to speak.

"Um… Levi?" You finally broke the silence when you finished up cleaning the wound. "Why you were so against of the idea of me joining to survey corps?" The question just rolled off your tongue without you even thinking about it. You had heard his arguments back then when you eavesdropped his and Hange's conversation, but you needed to hear it straight from him before you'd truly believe it. Until now you had been too much of a coward to confront him about it, but something had changed. Even though Levi was injured and seemed to be slightly embarrassed by you tending him, he had trusted you enough to let you close to him― which in exchange made you feel like it was alright to let your guard down and be vulnerable, even for a short moment… but that safe and secure feeling you had a moment ago started to quickly fade away when Levi didn't answer; His brow furrowed even so slightly when he heard the question, but then he seemed to zone out for a second. You watched him in silence, trying to read the subtle hints on his expressionless face. It didn't take more than a few seconds when Levi snapped back to the reality, giving one cautious glance to your direction before he just sighed and turned his gaze down.

"There are two types of people who join the scout regiment;" He finally said. "Those who want to make a difference… and those who just do it for the heck of it." Even though you couldn't see it, the way he said this told you he was smiling as he spoke― But there was also a hint of sadness in his voice. "The ones who are just ready to throw their life away, but also need to convince themselves that they're doing something meaningful. Pretty fucking stupid, if you ask me." Then he remained quiet for another moment, weighing his words carefully before speaking again. "I guess I just wanted to figure out which one you were before you'd throw yourself to the wolves for the sake of the humanity." Finally lifting his gaze, Levi gave you short smile. The look in those thundercloud eyes was both soft and sorrowful― It felt like that single gaze exposed a whole new side of him to you, a part of him which was always hidden deep down under the layers of arrogance and coarse, witty remarks.

"So… have you been able to figure it out yet?" You replied to his smile with a sympathetic― and maybe slightly mischievous― look. "Which type I am?"

"Yeah."


	20. Ch20 A Drink Or Two

"[f/n] is one of the greatest soldiers I've ever seen..!" Eren declared, momentarily wrapping his arm around your shoulders. "Nothing can stop her!"

Now safe behind the walls, your little group was having a small get-together in the base mess hall to celebrate the return from a successful expedition; Rest of the trip went as planned and without too many casualties, which was enough of a reason for celebration. And, as a plus, if nothing else good came out of your near-to-death battle with two abnormals, at least Levi seemed to trust you a bit more out there on the field.

"Like I said, I just got lucky―" You sneered into your drink before taking a sip. "But, if there's any advice I can give you, it is to expect the unexpected… and never let your guard down. It would've been quite an anticlimax to get crushed by a crumbling watchtower instead of a titan."

"And who was that again who saved you from such a fate?" Connie grinned, giving you a poke below the ribs in a teasing manner.

"Captain." You slightly furrowed your brow as you replied to his question. "You were there. Why you-"

"No, not captain..!" Connie groaned, seemingly unpleased with your answer. "Let me ask it this way; Who brought Captain out there to save your ass?" A smug grin spread onto his face as he repeated the question in a bit different form this time.

"You're quite egotistical little brat, you knew that?" You shot a miffed look at your friend, but couldn't keep your act up for long and broke out giggling. Everyone else were laughing too― Everyone except Mikasa, who was quietly glaring at you across the table. Starting to feel slightly uncomfortable, you slipped away from the crowd and approached Krista and Ymir who were together as usually.

"What's up, hero?" Ymir greeted you in her usual haughty demeanor. "Looking troubled, I see."

"Well… yeah." Not even bothering to deny it, you chose to seek an advice instead. "I don't know if you've noticed it, but Mikasa keeps staring at me. Or at least I feel like she is, maybe it's just my imagination-"

"We're not blind!" Ymir scoffed. "Of course we've seen the way she glares at you."

"Ymir! Manners, please..!" Krista scowled at her friend, but she acted as if she didn't even notice it.

"Are you too dumb to notice how Eren is always clinging onto you? He's your number one fan, how cute~!" Brunette continued her condescending blabbering. "And secretly hopes to be more than that, I bet!" She added in more mischievous tone.

"What Ymir is trying to say, is that Mikasa might be a bit… jealous, I guess?" Krista tried to clear up her friend's words to you as you just stood there mouth open and dumbfounded.

"Jealous? Of me?" You furrowed your brow. "Why in the world?"

"Pfft, she really is dumber than she looks." Ymir rolled her eyes, but you were too focused on what Krista was about to say to even notice it.

"Well… You know how she is with Eren, right?" Krista smiled sheepishly. "And he does like you, a lot… not necessarily in a way Ymir thinks he does, but still."

"Not necessarily?" Ymir scoffed again. "Wanna bet on it?"

Now even more confused than before, you were about to head back and join the others when you noticed a raven haired man entering the room― Not too much of a people person, Levi lingered by the doorway, not-so-politely turning down the offer to join the merry bunch when Jean in his drunken courage asked him to take shots with them.

"Didn't expect to see you here..!" You gave Levi a smile as you walked up to him. "But if you want to actually enjoy the party, I'd suggest you to stop lingering in the doorway and come on in." You added with a wink, not even trying to hide the mischievous tone of your voice. "Sit down and have a drink, geez~!"

"And what makes you think I want to join to this…" He spoke in a bored tone as he scanned the room, pausing for a second when he saw Connie, who was trying to fit as many wine bottle corks into his mouth as possible because of the silly bet he had with Jean. "...this… party..?" Levi drawled, simply too baffled to take his eyes from the unpleasant sight of the cork-mouth Connie.

"Uh… If that's not the case, why you're here then?" You furrowed your brow in confusion. Slowly turning his gaze back to you, Levi opened his mouth to answer, but you could already tell what he was about to say. "You don't need a reason. Of course." You answered to your own question a stoic look on your face. "But, since you're here… a drink or two?" You suggested cautiously. Levi didn't look too excited about the idea, but you were persistent― Even though he didn't want to admit it, he must've come there for a reason. "Aw come on..! Don't be such a party-pooper!" Not giving him a chance to refuse, you grabbed onto his arm and marched back into the room, dragging the quietly grumbling regiment captain in there with you. Taken by a surprise by your bold actions, Levi didn't protest― Deciding it was better not to shove him middle of the craziest party-group, you led him to the quiet corner table instead. Only after sitting him down and plopping onto the seat across from him, you noticed that his cheeks were even so slightly flushed. Was it from embarrassment or purely out of discomfort, you didn't know.

"Alright, fine." Levi muttered under his breath, finally submitting to his fate as he watched you pour both of you a drink. "I guess there's a reason to celebrate, so why not?"

"Exactly." You smirked when Levi seemed to relax a bit, taking off his jacket and placing it on the back of his chair― You could even swear you saw his lips curl into a slight smile when he accepted the drink. Your joining to the scout regiment caused quite a bit more drama than expected, but things were slowly and surely returning to normal. Even though you still felt a sting in your heart when thinking back to the things he had said back then, it was time to forget and forgive; Even though you didn't want to admit it, you had missed him… a lot. " _If I want things to return to normal between us, this is one step to the right direction."_ You thought to yourself, giving him a slightly teasing look as you raised your glass. "So, do we have a reason for a toast? Or are we just getting wasted?" You asked, flashing him another impish smirk.

"We can always do both." Levi replied to your witty remark. "For a successful expedition― and the fact that even an idiot like you made it back alive." He stated as he raised his glass.

"Oh geez, thanks. I feel so honored..!" You gave him a stoic look before taking a long gulp of your drink― even a bit too long, making it hard not to wince at the taste of the hard liquor. Levi chuckled a bit at your reaction, taking a sip of his drink as well.

"But honestly, though… you did well out there." He added after a short moment of silence.

"Well that sounds better..!" You smirked, handing your glass to him for a refill. "How about if you'll pour me another one and tell me more?"

Even though you were supposed to have only one or two drinks, you ended up finishing the whole bottle with Levi. Captain Levi indeed became more chatty and more approachable when he had a few drinks― He didn't even seem to mind when Eren and Jean joined to your company (Connie, instead, had called it a night after the shock of almost choking into one of the bottle corks). Even though you considered Eren as one of your closest friends in the scout regiment, you couldn't help but to feel slightly uncomfortable when he sat right next to you on the bench. Maybe it was just your imagination playing tricks on you, but you felt like he was sitting closer than normally he would.

" _Damn Ymir..! Why she has to be such a lousy-mouth?!"_ You secretly scowled at her direction, trying your best to act as if nothing was wrong. " _Now I can't help but to feel like everything Eren does has something to do with him possibly being interested in me!"_ On top of it all, you caught Mikasa glaring at you again from the another side of the room. The whole thing was getting ridiculous!

"What do you mean I'm speaking incom… incomprh…" Jean's loud gabble snapped you back to the reality.

"Incomprehensibly?" Eren repeated, not too convinced of his friend's performance.

"Whatever! I'll drink all of you under the table, just saying..!" Jean stated confidently, giving all of you a meaningful look to tell you the challenge was on.

"Alright, alright..! I believe you..!" You chuckled at his drunken act. Instinctively glancing at Levi, for your surprise you found him staring at the person next to you― Back in his usual stolid and severe act, Levi didn't take his eyes from Eren for a good minute, not breaking off the stare even after his target noticed this. When Eren answered the glare with a similar scowl, the atmosphere was quickly growing tense; Thankfully Jean, who didn't even notice the exchange of glares, just then realized that your table was running out of booze.

"I'll go get a few bottles more..!" You volunteered. Honestly, though, you just wanted out of the tensed up situation and clear up your head a bit. But, what you didn't expect, was Eren offering to accompany you.

"If you want some company, I'll gladly join you." He said, not even waiting for an answer before standing up. "The food storage room is such a murky place that-"

"We'll be fine, thank you very much."

You almost squealed in surprise when you felt someone grab a firm hold of your arm― Being so focused on trying to make up an excuse to turn down Eren's offer, you hadn't even noticed Levi get up from his seat. Leaving the flustered Eren at the table with Jean, Levi marched out of the room, tugging you after him in such a vigorous manner that you almost tripped over your own feet.

"I- I can go by myself―" You managed to blurt out after recovering from your bafflement, still struggling to keep up with his haste walking pace― Being more or less intoxicated didn't make it any easier, only the opposite. "It's no trouble, not at all..! And- Uh… Isn't the kitchen in the other direction?"


End file.
